When you're going through a period where you're unsure about yourself and everything around you, it's so much easier to look at yourself through the eyes of your best friend, a sibling, a parent, or anyone else whom you know loves you no matter what. We are often our worst critics. We judge ourselves based on our imperfections and our mistakes, as if every decision we take is part of a make-or-break situation.
But, honestly, has dwelling over our mistakes ever done us any good?
Yes, we realize we did something wrong and yes, we know not to do it again, but what else? Besides those two things, we don't get anything else of value. What we do get is guilt, regret, feelings of being a failure, and other unhelpful thoughts - which all lead to unproductivity.
However, if we look at ourselves through the eyes of a best friend, we'd begin to see the entire picture and not zoom in on the "bad" parts. You might find that you suddenly feel lighter — as if some heavy load was lifted off of you — and that nothing is as terrible and serious as you thought it was.
Why is that? Because with someone else, you learn to laugh at your own mistakes.
And through that laughter, the expectation of perfection is lifted and you realize that yes, you did something wrong, and yes, you wouldn't do it again - but you also realize that you are perfectly okay in your imperfectness.
Consequently, your vision becomes so much clearer because you realize you have the tools to rectify the situation. Most importantly, though, you understand that you're not supposed to spend every waking hour in guilt because it's inefficient.
All our emotional energy that's going towards feeling bad could be optimized by understanding what to do differently, planning for the next time, and then assuring ourselves that you did your best - because you did.
So to the best of your ability, try to be emotionally efficient. And sometimes, the best way to do that is to laugh at your mistakes. If you can't, don't worry, someone else gladly will!