What To Expect When Dating a Firefighter

What You Need To Know Before Falling For A Firefighter

You're going to be proud of him, but you must prepare for what comes with dating a fire fighter.

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To the significant other of a firefighter,

Are you ready?

Are you ready for the time that needs to be committed to being with a firefighter? They made the commitment to take on a call when help is needed. Are you prepared for them to get up and go? A firefighter is brave, noble, and kind. They risk their lives to save those of others who are in danger and need their help.

If you can't make the same commitment to them, that they do to the station, I don't suggest being with them.

I have been seeing my boyfriend for a little less than a year. And while he doesn't work at the station full time and is a volunteer, I've seen the love and passion he has. Making the decision to become a firefighter, is not something someone can do overnight. It's a decision much greater than trying to figure out what to have for breakfast in the morning.

Being a firefighter means late night calls. Being a firefighter means, seeing things you can never un-see. Being a firefighter isn't a job for those who just want the title. They go through rigorous training, they need to be EMT certified, you must be physically able to; climb large amounts of stairs, drag the hose and carry the equipment without struggle, be capable of forcible entry, search and rescue and more.

Being a firefighter takes a lot of heart and soul. Even being a volunteer means making a big commitment to helping your team in whatever calls come their way.

If you want to be with a firefighter, you have to be in love with the firefighter. I fell in love with mine while he was taking a call. He actually came to my rescue, as I had passed out at the dance club his parents own. He got there and, because he had known me already, even if only for a short time, he stayed with me until I reached the hospital and my mom had gotten there. You could see the passion in his eyes. His strong need to help and protect.

When you fall in love with a firefighter, you are going to fall hard.

But you must be willing to compromise. There will be times where he will get up in the middle of the night to take a call. Kiss him goodbye, tell him you love him and wish him luck. It can be scary at times, but they know what they're doing. They're smart. Have the station's number on speed dial. If you can't get a hold of him, 9 times out of ten, he'll be at the station.

Get to know the other members at the station, including his chief. The more you show your face and get involved, the better he looks too. That's his second family, they should be yours too.

With dating a firefighter comes responsibility. You owe him love and understanding. Anything else will be extra. Rub his shoulders when he slumps on the couch after taking a call. Surprise him every now and then with dinner and his favorite beer. He won't ask you for a lot, in fact, he probably would never ask you for anything. But, always be sure to show him you love him and that you couldn't be more proud of the man he is. The man you love. Your firefighter.

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An Appreciation Letter To My Boyfriend

I don't think I say it enough...
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To My Loving Boyfriend,

To start off, here's something I don't say nearly enough: thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you from the bottom of my heart. You do so much for me that I can't even put into words how much I appreciate everything you do - and have done - for me over the course of our relationship so far. While every couple has their fair share of tiffs and disagreements, thank you for getting through all of them with me and making us a better couple at the other end. With any argument, we don't just throw in the towel and say we're done, but we work towards a solution that puts us in a greater place each day. Thank you for always working with me and never giving up on us.

Thank you for being supportive with everything that I want to do. Instead of trying to convince me 'no', you're encouraging me with a 'yes' or 'you got it'. Having you as my number one cheerleader is such a blessing, because I know I'll always have someone rooting for me. And you know that as much as you're cheering for me, I'm cheering for you right back. Having such immense support for one another is so important in any relationship, and I'm so lucky to have that kind of love and attention coming from you everyday.

I just wanted to let you know that I appreciate you more than words can write. I could probably talk for hours about how much I love you and how obsessed I am with you, but that's a little too much to put into an approximately 500 word piece. More importantly than telling you, I hope I'm able to show you everyday through my actions how much of a positive impact you have on my life. I'm certainly not the same person I was when we first started talking over two years ago, but I'm definitely a better person today than then, with a big thanks to you for that. You've helped me grow so much and I know you'll help me to improve for the better even more in the future.

I can't wait to see where life's adventures take us next. The only thing I know is that I definitely want to enjoy those adventures with you by my side. I promise to keep enjoying all of the little things that make every day with you so amazing. Thank you for the thousandth for everything that you do for me, because I don't know where I would be - or who I would be - had it not been you by my side all this time. Thank you for being my best friend, my secret keeper, and my confidante. And if I don't say it enough, always know I love you and everything that you do.

With So Much Love,

Your Very Appreciative Girlfriend

Cover Image Credit: Kayla Master

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To The Girl Telling Herself She Doesn't 'Catch Feelings,' Stop Lying To Yourself

"Catching feels" is not synonymous with a sickness, but with embracing the human capacity to feel that we all too often neglect.

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We're all guilty of it. We think we have this incredible Great Wall of China protecting our vulnerability; however, we tend to overestimate its security with defense mechanisms that could potentially hurt us in the long-term, concerning the formation of future relationships.

We must let others in to embrace the process of falling for someone

If you're like me, constantly busy and preoccupied with life's demands (sometimes going days without proper inhalation and exhalation), we become almost numb and ignorant of our emotions, mostly as a result from not putting ourselves out there. But this lack of experience is wrongly mistaken for the notion of attachment resistance. It's OK to focus on yourself, but after a while, it is necessary and fun to reawaken those feelings and jubilant moods associated with falling for someone, because in the midst of life's madness, we often forget how to feel.

Do not attempt to avoid to "catch feels" like it's the plague

We're consistently bombarded with false advice from society to avoid "catching feels," or falling for someone, no matter the costs. Why is it suddenly so frowned upon to actually like someone you met? Why should we feel shame in wanting to continue a relationship with this person? Dating is evidently complicated in the 21st century, but don't let this make you try to consciously repress those newly-formed feelings since repression essentially leads to escalation. Embrace the feels because it's the human thing to do.

Loosen your wall's bricks with vulnerability

Some of our jerk-alert senses are more activated than others, mostly due to past experiences, but it's important to hammer into our heads that they're not all the same.

Stop lying to yourself. No matter how much you repress it, you will feel, you will get attached, and you will allow yourself to do this, despite what the norm is for what "dating" is today. Break off from your defense mechanisms and your wall will slowly follow. Remember: "catching feels" is not synonymous with sickness, but with embracing the human capacity to feel that we all too often neglect.

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