On my way back to my dorm one evening, I noticed a girl sitting on one of the couches in the campus center almost in tears. She was on the phone talking with someone about how her play was going to fall apart. I didn't want to seem like a snoop but I couldn't help it. I felt bad. After the girl hung up her phone, I gave a small "Are you OK?" The girl replied, "Yeah." After she told me about her situation, I told her, "Keep your head up. It will all be OK in the end." She smiled and thanked me before I went on my way.
I've been known to be kind and caring throughout my entire life. The words "I feel bad" are basically not in my dictionary of phrases. When I say "I feel bad," I really do mean it.
Another example, I had a really stressful and tiring week once. On top of papers, school work, my family visiting, producing my show and working crew for other shows, and being sick, I was exhausted. By the way, that week happened to be the week of the big Whiteout game.
The night before the game, I did what no Oswego Hockey fan would ever do: give up their Whiteout ticket. Yes, I, Ilyssa Weiner, went out at 7:30 in the morning the Sunday before Whiteout to wait four and a half hours for tickets, only to end up giving up my ticket the night before the game. I ended up giving my ticket to my friend's suitemate, who I'm also very good friends with. Come at me, Lakers fans.
Unfortunately, my kindness and care for others have gotten me stepped on on multiple occasions. Thus, I have also developed a very sensitive personality. I tend to cry -- a lot. At this point, I think I cry at least once a week for no reason. The little things make me break down.
If I feel lonely, I break down and cry. If I get jealous, I break down and cry. If I feel stressed, I break down and cry. If someone says or does something mean to me, I break down and cry. I've been called a "drama queen" on multiple occasions because people assume I'm crying just for attention. I'm not. I'm a drama queen, but I'm not trying to get people's attention when I cry. I cry because of my sensitivity.
People assume it's the kindest people that are considered the "weakest" and that "nice guys finish last." I don't think so. If you're a kind person, you're a stronger person than someone who's not kind. The person who's not kind just likes to make others feel bad about themselves. It's not fair for people to assume the tougher and meaner people are the ones that are going to make it in the world. People can't also assume that every person in the world is "kind" either, because there are people who are intentionally mean.
People who are straightforward kind need to be appreciated a little bit more. I'm not talking about sensationalizing kindness with big, fancy movements or news stories about a man who rescues his dog from a fire. I'm talking about the simpler ways to appreciate kind people.
Say "thank you" when someone opens a door or hands you a rundown. Let the person who takes time out of their busy schedule to comfort you about your situation do so. If someone hands you an opportunity, like a Whiteout ticket, take it. For these actions only prove that kindness is associated with strength and not with weakness.
