In all honesty, this week has been a really difficult one for me. I got a test back that did not go my way at all. I spent hours upon hours in the basement of the library studying until content for three different classes all ran together. A few of my personal relationships are strained, and with all my extracurricular involvement, I feel like I'm spreading myself really thin.
College is hard in general, and lately it's been harder than ever. Second semester has brought tougher classes, professors who are less lenient, and more opportunities to plug in - and devote time - to things other than schoolwork. It feels like I'm running around like a chicken with its head cut off, just going from one stressor to the next. Tonight, however, as I was sitting down to cram for an upcoming biology exam, I had a breakthrough. One of my tried and true studying songs, "Keep Your Head Up" by Andy Grammer, came on and I feel like I really heard the lyrics for the first time.
"The glow that the sun gives right around sunset helps me realize, this is just a journey, drop your worries. You are gonna turn out fine."
"I know it's hard, know its hard, to remember sometimes, but you gotta keep your head up, and you can let your hair down."
I feel like it was fate, destiny, or maybe an act of God that caused me to hear these words at a time when I desperately needed them. I think it's about time I realized just how trivial so many of my worries are. This exam that I'm stressing about probably won't even be on my radar a month from now. Ultimately, I'm at college to better myself and become the best me I can be. I am here to accomplish my goals, and be able to lead a life I'm passionate about. I'm involving myself in lots of extracurriculars so that I can say I made the most out of this time in my life.
At the end of the day, I want to be someone that my future spouse and children admire and look up to. I want to be someone who tries hard to accomplish what she sets her mind to, even if things look grim. I want to be the kind of person who boldly accepts a challenge, doesn't back down, and gives it her all. At the same time, if I try my best, I want to be the kind of person who accepts that and doesn't beat myself up if everything doesn't go exactly the way I've planned. I am ready to face these small bumps in the road because I know they are chances to improve myself, but I won't let these challenges break me down. Sometimes, you just need to drop your worries and realize that your life's big picture is comprised of much more than the challenges you face. It's your reaction to those hardships that defines who you really are. So I think I'll keep my head up until further notice.
