JordynGate: Why I Don't And Won't Care

Assuming you've talked to more than three people under the age of 30 in these past few weeks, you've probably heard at least something about the Jordyn Woods/Khloe Kardashian/Tristan Thompson scandal. If you haven't, to make a long story short, Jordyn Woods (Kylie Jenner's bestie) was caught hooking up with Tristan Thompson (Khloe Kardashian's baby-daddy).

The uncovered cheating resulted in a whole lot of drama for the Kardashian-Jenner clan, forcing them to choose between family and friends, and putting Khloe in a position of publicly having to decide how to handle Tristan's infidelity.

So now you're about as caught up as I am, and also as caught up as I ever hope to be.

I'm going to say something that many of my friends seem to find appalling, shocking, and even controversial: I do not give a single damn what else happens in this drama. I did not care when it first came out, and I will not care when it is resolved.

I am not interested in celebrity news. I am not interested in who got work done, or who is sleeping with who, or what pair of friends are feuding again. I do NOT want to keep up with the Kardashians.

It's not that I don't like gossip, because trust me, it's one of my worst habits. I could talk about my high school classmates or the local moms for hours (I could, but I really try not to!)

When it comes to celebrity drama, however, I'm honestly just bored. Why should I be invested in people who have zero relevance in my life? I don't have the time or mental energy to keep tabs on people who I do not and most likely never will know.

My friends are utterly confused by this. I am utterly confused by their almost manic fascination with strangers.

It is exhausting enough to manage my own personal drama. I just don't really have an interest in being bothered to care about someone else's.

I wish I could say I had a better reason, like not wanting to exploit someone else's personal life for my own entertainment, but the plain truth is that I am too lazy to care.

I do not want to talk about the latest update in JordynGate. I do not have an opinion. I will not pick a side. I do not want to hear your analysis of the situation.

Please, do not ask. I really, truly, just don't care.