Growing up was a bit of a challenge for me. As a young child, I faced confusion and insecurity from the actions of those who were vested with my care. By the time I reached my teenage years, I had a greater understanding of what I was actually up against. The outlook for my life was fairly grim.

There are a few things I can point to which gave me the strength and hope to hang on. Journey Escape album, my best friend, and John Hughes movies.

John Hughes understood the complexity of human emotions. In his movies, I was able to find glimmers of hope. The hope of life after childhood. The hope of strength. The hope of friendship. The hope of acceptance. The hope of love.

Did I believe everything on the surface of the movies? No, this was Hollywood. These were stories meant to amuse, entertain, and connect feelings and emotions. Were the stories plausible? Is any story plausible? As a writer, now I can say, yes and no.

These movies came out in the 1980's. They had the political and societal constructs to work within. Does this make them right? Again, yes and no. They worked with issues of the time with the understanding of the time.

From "Ferris Bueller" I learned, school officials aren't always going to be there for you or have your best interest at heart. From "The Breakfast Club" I learned we have more similarities than we admit. We are all just a little broken, and if we're lucky, we can find a way to connect that will last. From "Sixteen Candles" I learned life is a circus but, in the end, you may get lucky enough to find someone who sees you and likes you for you. From "Pretty In Pink" I learned socio-economic boundaries don't have to be solid lines. It's possible to have people who love you. I want to add in more than just a romantic way, but the biggest lesson for me was, I could be loved. Period.

In a time before child abuse, bullying, and other forms of abuse were discussed or even acknowledged; these movies gave me an escape. These movies, with all their modern-day perceived flaws, is many ways, saved my life. Their imperfections give a depth of humanity to what would otherwise be teen fluff, easily dismissed and dated.

Please stop looking back and judging them with today's standards and dismiss them as unworthy. They are the movies that gave me an escape, and hope, they kept me alive in my darkest hours. I agree, there are so many flaws to them. It was a different time. We've grown, we've learned, we know better now. That is the secret to life, the reason we're here. To grow and learn. We must start from somewhere and move forward from there.

Can we look back and appreciate the good? Take that and build better? There is an underlying celebration of humanity, please, don't lose sight of it in your attempt to judge and assert your superiority. I had few illusions that what was being represented was real life, it was a stylized version of what it could be. It gave me hope that the hell I was living through could end.