I remember when I was a little girl, maybe six years old, my nana always told me to be careful who I kept company with. She would tell me in her gentle, but wise voice, “Some people are mean for no reason, some people don’t want what’s best for you, some people want to see you fail.” And as young as I was, I thought she was crazy. Why would people be mean for no reason? What kind of monster wants to see anybody fail? At the time, I couldn’t process what she truly meant; I would question her words and doubt her message. But now, almost eleven years later, I finally understand what she was trying to say. Through firsthand-and secondhand-situations, I’ve had my fair share of fake friends, rude strangers, and bullies.
The first time I really encountered the type of person that my nana had warned me about (well, the first time it made an impression) was two summers ago. My friend had been betrayed by someone she considered her best friend, and I invited her to sleep over my house so we could watch movies together and eat ice cream. I remember how much she cried that night. I can recall feeling sick to my stomach that someone could be so malicious and spiteful, and knowingly cause my friend so much sadness.
Now, looking back on all this and so much more, I realize that everyone has a reason for their actions, no matter how wrong they may be. I understand that sometimes people have bad days, which is inevitable even for the happiest people, but I can’t help but wonder, why are we so mean to each other? Why do we, as teenagers, as adults, as humans in general, want to bring other people down? In retrospect, it doesn’t really matter how much money we made, how nice the cars we drive are or how many diamond rings we own. Nobody is going to look back and remember you for the lavish, flat-screen TV you owned, or the jewelry you wore. It might cross people’s minds for a second, but what you’ll really be remembered for is the type of person you are, the impact you left on people. It’s nice to be successful, yes, but the only thing that truly matters is the relationships we create during the arduous journey we call life. So why are we so filled with negativity? Why do we always get the urge to one-up our friends when they accomplish something, no matter how big or how small?
It’s no secret that we always want what we can’t have. Maybe we’re too busy chasing after the things we don’t have-and maybe we don’t have them for a reason that we can’t focus on anything else. Maybe we are too caught up in how much money we make, how nice the cars we drive are and how many diamond rings we own. Maybe the flat-screen TVs and expensive jewelry have blinded us from what really matters. According to Dr. Travis Bradberry from Huffington Post, “one troubling habit of chronically unhappy people is bringing others down.” Maybe we’re all secretly a little unhappy with ourselves.
Regardless of what the reason is, it’s time for a change. It’s time to compliment our acquaintances on simple things, like their outfit or an idea they had, instead of scowling or making fun of them. It’s time to congratulate our friends on their accomplishments instead of only trying to secretly make ourselves seem better than them. It’s time to smile at our neighbors instead of pretending we don’t see them. It’s time to spread positivity, love, and acceptance instead of spreading negativity, hatred, and judgment.
