The past few weeks I've been feeling really homesick. I've been trying to get through each day quickly to just get to the next day. I've been craving my bed at home, the home-cooked and vegetarian conscious meals at home, and my family. At first, I was ashamed that I was homesick, worried that if I told people why I was feeling so down, they would make fun of me for wanting my mom. But then I realized that it's OK to miss home. In fact, it'd be weird if I never missed home.
It's OK to be homesick and it's OK to have rough days sometimes. It took me a long time to get settled back into school this year. There were many issues socially and routine-wise that I didn't think I would have to tackle this year. I struggled with adjusting to new roommates and living with three girls instead of just one. I'm still adjusting to everyone's living habits and organizational levels, and I miss the familiarity of my house. I struggled, at first, with keeping my workout routine steady and consistent. It's hard to make time for long runs on days when there seems like there's barely enough time to eat a meal. It's hard to want to make time at school, whereas at home, I had so much time. I had familiar routes that I knew the mileage of and I had the motivation.
At home, I have a wonderful support system-- my parents are there for me whenever I need them and my sisters are conscious of my emotions. It's so easy to be myself and to express how I feel around my family because they've known me the longest of anyone. At school, my relationships are still relatively new. Even my oldest friends at school I've only known for a year and a half. My newest friendships are barely a month and a half old. Though there are some people on campus I feel entirely comfortable with, who know me incredibly well, nothing can beat the comfort of how well your mom knows you. Sometimes I think my mom knows me better than I know myself.
It's hard being sixteen hours from home or two hours from home. It's hard adjusting to a new environment, even if it's your second year in a row in the same place. It doesn't get easier, and I think that sometimes it gets harder to leave year after year. Looking back, the summer isn't quite long enough to be at home with your family, and yet, during the summer I remember feeling that the school year couldn't come fast enough so I could see all of my friends again.
It's OK to be homesick, and it's OK to miss your family. We've all been there.
