Out of habit, when you see someone you know, what’s one of the first things you ask them: how are you? And the typical response is, “I’m good, how are you?” You then say, “Good to hear! I’ve been good as well.” People hear that and they think your life is great, but did you really mean that you’ve been “good”, or is that what you said because it’s a habit?
I remember specifically one day last week, when four people asked me how I was doing before 8:00 a.m. I responded by saying, “I’m okay” to each of them. I got concerned looks like people were thinking I was going through something terrible or that my world was falling apart. Others were taken back by it because they were expecting the typical answer of “good.” One even asked, “Oh I’m sorry. Why?” Well, because my life isn’t always great and if yours is then you’re lying.
Out of respect for others, we kindly ask how they are doing in passing. Those are the people we see every day, know their names, and that’s about it. That doesn’t mean we can’t be honest with them. I respect other people’s honesty so I expect them to respect mine. Just because I said “I’m okay” doesn’t mean that I’m miserable. I have had better days and I have had worse days. Being okay doesn’t mean you should worry about me or feel bad for me. Feeling okay is a normal human feeling that everyone feels. It shouldn’t be frowned upon.
Having a good day every day is what we all strive for, but that’s not going to happen. Sometimes you drop your tv on your head and spill your full bag of trail mix within five minutes (yes that happened to me last week). Sometimes you do a lot of driving in one weekend and you’re just irritated from all the traffic and being stuck in a car for so long. Sometimes you just can’t seem to do anything right no matter how hard you try. If everything in your life went perfectly all the time, then you wouldn’t know how to deal with the lows when they came.
Feeling okay isn’t a bad thing, but we all want to be "good" or even "great". And we have those days, which is awesome! I am thankful that my "goods" and "greats" are more plentiful than my "okays", but being okay is fine. It’s okay to be okay. People make us feel wrong for feeling that way, but why? It’s just how we feel sometimes. It will pass and more good days will come in the future. Next time you ask someone how they are doing, don’t expect a positive answer. And don’t be awkward or treat them like a child if they say they’re doing okay. We’re only human. None of our lives are perfect.
