“Where are you going to college next year?”

“You’re so smart, I’m sure universities are paying you to go to their school.”

“You’re too good for this school.”

“You’re not good enough for that school.”

“This is one of the biggest decisions of your life!”

These remarks are just a few of the many I received as a senior in high school, on the cusp of adulthood, where the possibilities were seemingly endless..

…until we started talking about college.

College is undoubtedly the buzzword among American high school seniors, striking excitement, fear, and anxiety in the unbeknownst hearts of teenagers as they make the major step from childhood into adulthood. The majority of high school students look forward to college: no parents to hassle them, no snickering peers in the hallway, no 8:00 AM classes, and definitely no more pep rallies.

So why is it when “college” is mentioned among a group of high school seniors, the tension in the room is so thick you could cut it with a knife?

Perhaps it is because the American culture has placed such high stakes on the word “college.” According to this mentality, college is no longer a place you go to learn and earn a degree, but rather a place you go, in fact, the only place you can go, to be successful.

I know this to be true from personal experience. As a student who committed their time in high school to straight As, community service, and leadership, when it came time to pick a college, all of these components factored into what others told me would make a good choice. So just like a good straight A student would do, I applied to several schools… I spent my senior year writing essays, requesting letters of recommendation, visiting college campuses all across the country, attending scholarship competitions, and talking with my guidance counselor constantly. College, as I was told, was the next step in my successfulness.

I applied to three private universities out of state, two in-state universities, and one private university close to home that I didn’t see myself going to, just because I knew it was affordable, as a back-up option. I was accepted to every college I applied to, but it didn’t make my decision any easier. When I started to look at how much it would cost to leave Arizona for college, I was shocked. Even while receiving the highest scholarships from each university, these schools would be way too expensive without taking out mountains of students loans.

So I committed to a private college out of state, bit my lip, and hoped the student loans wouldn’t be as bad as they looked. If I lived really frugally while working a part-time job in college, once I got a steady paying job, I would hopefully pay off my loans within a few years of graduating, and then I could actually really start making a profit and living my life by the time I reached my late 20s.

That was when I started reconsidering.

I want to travel all throughout Europe while I’m still young. I want to go on mission trips. I want to be involved in my leadership community at home. I want to write a novel while having the time and resources to publish and market it. I want to spend time with my family and not have to pay $150 for a plane ticket every time I want to see them. Oh wait, what $150? I was saving that to pay off my loans. I suddenly realized many of these dreams of mine would be impossible to achieve… or would have to be put on major standby, if I went out of state for college.

So here I am, the summer before my freshmen year of college, happily enrolled in the university dubbed my “back-up plan”. Most people expect me to be bitter, but I am actually completely content, and quite honestly, thrilled with my decision. Going to a more affordable college closer to home does not limit me like I initially believed, but expands my horizons and maximizes my future possibilities. When I put things in perspective, I came to an important realization: the college you choose does not define your success. The only thing that defines your success is the hard-work you put in to achieving what you are passionate about doing with the rest of your life.

When it boils down to it, college isn’t the only path to success, and the specific college you choose certainly isn’t an effective way to measure worth. For some students, choosing an expensive or prestigious school is the necessary path to achieve their dreams, and that’s entirely acceptable. For others, choosing community college is the best option, and that’s absolutely fine too. For some, entering the work force is the way to go, and that’s great.

From my experience, I think the most important message for high school seniors to hear is that at the end of the day, choose the step into your future that feels right for you personally. Just because the aspirations of other students are different from yours does not mean what they value is better, it just means that each person is unique. Do not let others influence the path of your future. It is the rest of your life after all, and if you follow your heart rather than follow the norm, you won’t regret your decision.