In the last few years, I realized there was something different about me. This different thing was not a recent development, and once I realized it, my life made more sense to me. I am an introvert.

An introvert is someone who increases their energy by being alone and loses their energy in stimulating spaces, such as social events. Not all introverts are the same, yet there are some common misconceptions and assumptions that are made about introverts frequently.

There are a few misconceptions about introverts, which I believe is the reason most people are reluctant to label themselves as such. Introverts are not loners, antisocial, or stuck-up. Most introverts are amicable, have friends, and are kind people.

So why is there a stereotype of introverts as loners? Introverts may need some alone time to recharge, but as an introvert myself, I would consider the time I spend with friends to the time I spend alone pretty much equal.

To extroverts, people who feel energized with social contact, the idea of needing alone time due to lack of energy from social interaction is unthinkable, but it is the reality for many introverts.

Introverts are not antisocial. There is a consensus among introverts that small talk is not our thing. This may be why most people are quick to assume that introverts are antisocial.

However, introverts love real and intimate discussions about virtually any topic under the sun. I am known in my large, loud and Hispanic family as being the quiet one, so when I engage in one on one conversation with my aunts or cousins they are always quite surprised. I love to talk, but I love to talk about real things, not trivial or superficial things that small talk generally consists of.

The most common and hurtful assumption I hear about introverts is that we are a rude and stuck-up bunch. Introverts are drained by socializing settings, and as such we are selective about how we expend our limited socializing energy. Introverts tend to stick to the outskirts at parties or group dinners, and this strategy is to distance themselves as a means of conserving their energy.

I’m an introvert, but that does not mean that I am antisocial, rude, or a loner. I love to engage in meaningful discussions about real topics. I could and do find myself talking for hours at social engagements, but you will rarely find me in the center of the action. I enjoy a fun party and group dinner with the best of them, but I may need to take some time to recharge by myself for a while afterward.

I am friendly and quite approachable, but it is rare that I will approach someone because I like my personal space respected and do unto others, as I would like done to me. I have a great friend group, and I consider the friendships I have result from my strengths as an introvert of being a good listener and a person of selective but meaning words.

The next time someone proudly declares their introversion I hope you consider that there is a lot more to a person that meets the eye, and people are more than the assumptions society makes about them.