I never truly understood how big of a role race could play before I came to school in South Georgia. I am from a suburb of Atlanta, so race has never been something I looked at when entering any relationship. Most of the time I find myself dating African American men just because that is my preference. Nobody really made a big deal of this before I came to Georgia Southern. The idea that my relationship could be judged simply because I am white and my boyfriend was black blew my mind. I would introduce him to my friends and while some of them didn’t even notice, some looked mortified.
I felt judgement from his friends too when I met them. I got talked about like I was “just a dumb white girl”, and got told that what we had wasn’t real, I was just a fling. How could they be so quick to ignorantly assume something of the sort? They didn’t know me, my friends didn’t know him, so why the judgement? I’ve come to the conclusion that this prejudice comes from stereotypes and assumptions people make, so I am here to set a few of these assumptions straight.
Yes, he is an African American male. No, He doesn’t sell drugs. No, he hasn’t been arrested multiple times. No, he doesn’t always ride around and blast his music, except when I am driving and my favorite song comes on. Yes, he is very kind. Yes, he is in school and working towards a degree. Yes, he does have a great family life. Yes, he works a job and provides for himself. Yes, he can actually hold a respectable conversation. No, he will not be disrespectful to you. No, he will not get into a fight if you invite him to a party. Yes, he is interested in more than smoking and going to the studio. Yes, he is actually my better half.
Yes, I am a Caucasian female. No, I do not have low self-esteem. No, I do not let him walk all over me. Yes, I do take pride in my relationship. Yes, I am with him because I like him for him, not just his race. Yes, I do demand his respect as well as anybody else’s. No, I am not with him because he is going to make it to the league. I want my own degree and my own money. Yes, my family is perfectly accepting of him. Yes, I am in a sorority. No that does not mean I am racist. No, I am not dating him because I am “going through a phase”. No, I do not pay for everything we do.
These are just a few of the many stereotypes I have run into and I’m sure many other people are constantly running into. 1 Corinthians 13: 4-6 says, “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” Nowhere in this scripture does it mention race. If my love fits all of these then my love is exactly what God intended for it to be. To all those who pass judgement of interracial love, just remember God doesn’t see race and neither does love.
