I've always been one of the girls who try every day when I get ready in the morning. I spend an hour and a half on my makeup, hair, and outfit every day before I leave for classes because I like looking put together. I like feeling like I tried every day even when I don't consciously try too hard because it makes my self-esteem feel much higher than it is on some days. I get compliments all of the time because of how I look and while I always appreciate the kind words people say to me, I'm still working on believing those words, myself.
Self-image is always a work in progress no matter who you are and it takes time before you start to see what the rest of the world sees in you. Everyone has to take the time in their lives to work on themselves before they can see what the world sees. You can be conscious of what the world thinks fo you, but its the work you put into yourself that matters.
It's like this, I've modeled, acted, and done pageants in my lifetime. I know in my brain that there must be aspects of my physical appearance that made me capable enough to do those sort of activities. However, I want to feel pretty on the inside, first, before feeling it on the outside. I want to feel that sort of confidence inside of me before anything else because my opinion is the one that matters the most about myself, not anyone else's.
It took many years of self-discovery and many nights picking apart my body in the mirror before I came to this conclusion about self-esteem and I think it's important for the world to know this, too, that my body is my body and good self-esteem and confidence does not come overnight. It takes years of work on your inner and outer appearance before you start to feel happy with where you are in life. It's all a balancing act and I know that at this point in my life that I am still a work in progress when it comes down to it.
I am thankful for the compliments in my lifetime and me writing this does not mean that I am upset for being complimented. I wanted to write the truth about self-image because I think in our society, anymore we just expect everyone to be the most confident person in the world in their appearance, but instead, we are all a work in progress and need the time for ourselves before we can take what others say about us to heart. I appreciate the body positivity and I am all for hyping people up to help their self-image, but true self-esteem comes from within, and external influences should never play a part in it. You are worth a million bucks, but you have to find that within yourself, first.