I'm Always The Girl Before The Girlfriend
Start writing a post
Swoon

I'm Always The Girl Before The Girlfriend

Just be honest next time.

4585
I'm Always The Girl Before The Girlfriend
Jose Chomali

The girl before the girlfriend.

What does this mean?

Well, let's say you meet someone and you hit off. You get together pretty often, text, and they tell you they like you. Maybe they take you out on a real date, maybe they don't.

Before you know it, it's been a few months and you still don't know where you stand with them. Obviously, you both have feelings for each other, but where is this going? You finally build up the courage to ask them what's going on and what they're looking for. The dreaded answer finally is said: "I'm not looking for a relationship right now". Ouch.

So, you finally break it off with the person.

You talk here and there and then suddenly, communication has completely stopped.

Guess what?

You see that same person who said they weren't looking for a relationship, IN A RELATIONSHIP.

That's how you become the girl before the girlfriend.

You know what that tells me?

It shows that they weren't ready for a relationship with you. No, you're not the problem at all. This happens quite often and it's very frustrating. I've gotten a handful of excuses such as, "I'm not ready to be in a relationship", I'm not looking for a relationship", "I'm worried I won't have time for you", and my all-time favorite, "I don't like labels".

The worst thing you can do is string somebody along for a period of time, gain their trust and affection, and then shatter their heart. It's like it's so easy for someone to move on so quickly while the other person is left behind feeling hurt and disappointed, let alone see them happy with someone else.

You start to think, "Why couldn't that be me?" "Was I not good enough?".

You are good enough and be glad that you're not with them because they weren't good enough for YOU.

My advice for anyone who has done this to another person is, to be honest with them and if you just don't think you're a good fit, tell them! It's a lot better than lying to them because eventually, they're going to see your relationship plastered all over social media anyway.

Sometimes I find it hard to be trusting because I never know if it's going to happen again. It's almost as if I expect it now. I know, down the road, that the right person will come along for me. I just got to go through the trial and error first.

To the "men" that have done this to me, I deserve a thank you, don't I?

I helped you realize what you wanted and I was the stepping stone towards you meeting the girl of your dreams. I also want to thank you because you also helped me realize, you're not even close to being the man of my dreams.

Report this Content
​a woman sitting at a table having a coffee
nappy.co

I can't say "thank you" enough to express how grateful I am for you coming into my life. You have made such a huge impact on my life. I would not be the person I am today without you and I know that you will keep inspiring me to become an even better version of myself.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

85018
college students waiting in a long line in the hallway
StableDiffusion

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less
a man and a woman sitting on the beach in front of the sunset

Whether you met your new love interest online, through mutual friends, or another way entirely, you'll definitely want to know what you're getting into. I mean, really, what's the point in entering a relationship with someone if you don't know whether or not you're compatible on a very basic level?

Consider these 21 questions to ask in the talking stage when getting to know that new guy or girl you just started talking to:

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

Challah vs. Easter Bread: A Delicious Dilemma

Is there really such a difference in Challah bread or Easter Bread?

51163
loaves of challah and easter bread stacked up aside each other, an abundance of food in baskets
StableDiffusion

Ever since I could remember, it was a treat to receive Easter Bread made by my grandmother. We would only have it once a year and the wait was excruciating. Now that my grandmother has gotten older, she has stopped baking a lot of her recipes that require a lot of hand usage--her traditional Italian baking means no machines. So for the past few years, I have missed enjoying my Easter Bread.

Keep Reading...Show less
Adulting

Unlocking Lake People's Secrets: 15 Must-Knows!

There's no other place you'd rather be in the summer.

986813
Group of joyful friends sitting in a boat
Haley Harvey

The people that spend their summers at the lake are a unique group of people.

Whether you grew up going to the lake, have only recently started going, or have only been once or twice, you know it takes a certain kind of person to be a lake person. To the long-time lake people, the lake holds a special place in your heart, no matter how dirty the water may look.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments