"Ahhh.. Bikini Bottom," [says in weird voiceover tone]. Home to some of the most unique characters on modern television. Speaking of unique characters, have you met the presidential candidates? Well, it has been an interesting race to say the least, so I decided to make this race more of a joke than it already is by connecting each of the candidates with Spongebob characters.
Starting with the Republican Candidates...
Donald Trump would be Eugene Krabs.
Here he is, Eugene Krabs, playing the world's smallest violin, "Let me play you a sad song on it." Both Trump and Mr. Krabs are given power through their money. They don't seem to let anyone forget that money is way more important than the lives of others. Trump truly doesn't care about the problems in the world and tends to joke about his empathy, which makes him the perfect fit for Mr. Krabs. Trump is also a dark shade of orange and Mr. Krabs is red, so I think it's close enough...
Ted Cruz would be Fred "My Leg."
Fred, otherwise known as the fish who yells "my leg" in the background of every episode, is constantly complaining. Nobody really knows Fred's name, but he is still a crucial part of the show. I see a strange connection between Fred and Cruz, and maybe that is because we never actually learn anything about either of their personalities. Just like Fred, Cruz always seems to be fully aware of the situation, but never seems to be fully there. At least he is trying to keep a leg up on the competition ... see what I did there?
Marco Rubio would be Sheldon Plankton.
Rubio's constant battle with Trump reminds me a little bit of the rivalry between Krabs and Plankton. His angsty personality, questionable past and love for small business owners makes me feel like he would probably work at the Chum Bucket. Plus, he has also been labeled "Little Rubio," so why not make him the smallest sea creature in Bikini Bottom?
John Kasich would be Squidward Tentacles.
On to the very short list of Democrats...
Bernie would be Spongebob Squarepants.
Bernie and Spongebob have this strange ability to connect to the younger generation, while annoying everyone else at the same time. They both have unrealistic dreams that everything will equal and perfect, but he seems like the kind of guy who would still get mad if you stole some of his grandma's cookies.
Hillary Clinton would be the Flying Dutchman.
Known for taking people's souls and condemning them to Davy Jone's locker, the Flying Dutchman could be Clinton's twin brother. They both make the innocent scared and use their strong personalities to intimidate others. Contrary to popular belief, Clinton and the Dutchman are not purely evil and they do have some companions. However, they both hold a lot of power and I don't think the world will ever understand why.
