If you're anything like me (an early 20-something in college), you've been watching all your friends lately getting engaged or married, and you've kind of had this look on your face when you see a new ring, a new photo, a new Facebook relationship status changed to "engaged":
That .gif is me.
I can't relate to all those posts, and that's OK. I am in a long-term relationship with someone I love, and we've been together for almost 4.5 years. Every time we return from a long break (summer, fall break, Christmas break, etc.) our friends ask us the same question: "Are you engaged yet?" My response is always to playfully glare at my boyfriend and say, "Not yet, but I'm waiting."
And I am. Let me be clear: I want to get married. I want a husband, a family, a house, 2.5 kids and a dog, all that. I want to take photos with a ring and a dress and flowers, I want a big wedding with all of my friends and family in attendance. But everywhere I look on social media, someone is getting engaged, married, or having a child. That's probably an experience that comes with being an early 20-something, but all I can think when I see it is, "We're in college. We graduated high school like yesterday. You guys started dating like a month ago."
It's not my place to judge people who want to or are getting married at my age; I'm happy for them and I'm glad that they've made their own choices. But for people like me, who feel almost a little pressured to get engaged or married at this early age, it's hard to watch. Everyone's doing it, so why shouldn't I? Why shouldn't you?
My position is this: if you love someone and you're ready to get married, do it. It'll make you happy and it's probably very fulfilling. But if you aren't ready, don't. Don't feel pressured. Cherish your person for the relationship and experiences you both are having now. Be content with being together. My boyfriend always tells me that a ring and a title won't change who or what we are. I like that thought. And besides, waiting a little while will allow the two of us to save up and plan and really have our dream wedding.
Waiting is OK, and getting married quickly is OK. Do what's best for you and your person, and don't compromise on the things you want. You'll be happier.
