Who am I? Have you ever taken a moment to stop and think about that question? If you are in college, you’ve probably considered it several times. Let’s just be real. It seems like the whole purpose of college is just to answer that question. Truth is, we are all searching for identity. Something that we can connect ourselves to, call our own and find a comfort or peace in.

I have discovered something during my collegiate career. There are two types of identity. There are those that you seek out, only to find future pain. They seem great for a moment but in the end only tear us down more than we ever thought possible. Then there are those identities that build us up. They give our heart joy and a desire to live and do something great!

Here are my questions that I want you to consider today. What is your identity? What is the source of that identity? Does that identity build you up, or does it tear you down?

To help you out, here is a little bit of my personal journey in seeking identity.

It all came to light in my freshman year. It was the first time that I was completely out on my own, no parents to control my every step, and I had a fresh canvas to paint whatever I wanted. For my first semester, things remained pretty similar to how they were when I was at home. I continued in what I had known for my entire life. Then, during Christmas break, something changed. I began to question who I was, wondering if my pursuits were something that I really wanted. I was concerned that I hadn’t become what I was really wanting. Boom… Identity crisis.

That spring semester of my freshman year, life went crazy. I began to search every crack and crevice to find my identity. Anything that showed some glimpse of promise, I tried it. Partying, drinking, acting out in whatever way possible, I stopped attending any type of Christian gatherings. At first, I thought it was great. I was finally getting a chance to make life my own. But the deeper I went, the more I realized that I wasn’t making my identity, but instead the things I was pursuing were taking control. What had originally started out as fun and exciting, was beginning to hurt a little bit and cost me more of myself every day.

I thought to myself, “Now what?” I thought I had tried it all, and yet still nothing seemed to fit. I learned that life without identity quickly becomes hopeless. Thanks to my search of the wrong identity, I was left without one and fell into the deepest darkest pit I had ever seen.

Then, I saw another glimmer of promise. Instead of fading like all the others, this one just kept getting brighter and brighter the closer I got. It was strange. I had known of this glimmer, this hope, my entire life, and yet it felt as if it were all brand new. The words of Romans 8:1-2 finally became real. “So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus. And because you belong to him, the power of the life-giving Spirit has freed you from the power of sin that leads to death.” I had a new shot at identity! But this time it was different. Instead of depending upon myself, my abilities, or the things in my life, my identity was simply in Christ. My search was over. The work had been complete. All I had to do to find identity was accept a gift, a peace, and a hope.

Since that moment, life has never been the same. Now, I don’t wake up worried about the tasks I need to do, the people I need to impress, or the words I need to say to create my image. Now, I can find rest. Now, instead of continuing on a never ending search to find fulfillment, I get to stop and enjoy this life. Now, I don’t have to search for happiness, I wake up filled with joy. Now, I have identity.

So maybe this is you too. Laying there, scrolling through Facebook, looking at all of these other people who seemed to have it figured out. Maybe you’re wondering who you are, just like I was a only a few years ago.

I’m not going to tell you what to do. I’ll bet you have enough people in your life doing that already. But I just want to ask you to consider those questions that I asked. Take a moment to ask yourself, “Who am I?” My advice, don’t just go with the answer that everyone else is chasing after. Discover that answer for yourself. Find that identity that will give you joy that lasts longer than a night.