Identity is a tricky thing because everyone has their own unique identity, yet people are expected to all act the same in certain areas of life. Identity, though it is unique to each individual person, is something that can be changed.
For example, my identity slightly changes in front of friends, versus my parents. The same goes for when I’m at school, versus a job interview.
In certain areas of life, we choose to highlight certain aspects of our personality and hide the ones we think would disappoint the people around us. The fear of not feeling accepted, or worthy, leads us to omit certain parts of ourselves that we think the other person will not like. Even if you’re the type of person that does not alter their identity to fit in, most likely, your identity is still going to change unintentionally over time.
When I was in elementary school, I remember trying to be the kid that everyone liked. So, I gave out my snacks at lunchtime, I helped people with their homework, and so much more. At the time, my identity was based on what other people thought of me. As I grew up, my identity changed.
Throughout my middle school years, I was less worried about everyone liking me and more concerned with blending in. I wanted to just blend in with the crowd, I felt like I had nothing special about myself. As I grew up, my identity changed yet again. Throughout my high school years, I became so worried about what people thought of me, that I altered my personality around certain people.
Now, I am at a point where my identity is based on what I think about myself. Due to the social context I was raised in, I will always care about the feedback I get from people. But as I’ve gotten older, I have realized that the feedback is not what defines me, the only opinion that will directly affect me is mine.
My identity has changed multiple times over the course of my life, and it will continue to change as I get older. Approval from others will always be a part of my identity because my social context has embedded that in me. There will be times when it is a larger factor of my identity, and times when it is a smaller factor. Identity is always changing, and so is one’s social context.
