By now, It's probably no secret: you're socially awkward, and although in today's day and age, sometimes girls use the term "awkward" in synonymy with the word "cute," but that is not the kind of awkward I know. I am talking real social awkwardness. The tongue-tying, feet stumbling, anxiety-having over normal day to day interactions, kind of awkward.
Awkwardness, insecurity, and anxiety have all bundled themselves into a neat little package that now inhabits the space in your brain where "normal" thoughts are supposed to reside. You're in that weird in between place where you don't know if you're a full blown recluse or if you're really trying to have a social life and you're just really bad at it. You end up being the awkward third person when you try to walk with people and there is only room for two people side by side on the sidewalk and you'll always end up stepping on the back of someone's heel. When you go to a restaurant and the waiter tells you to enjoy your meal and you say "you too," instead of just letting it slide you keep talking and make it worse. When you realize you're at an age where you actually have to do things without your parents like call the doctor to make an appointment or go to the bank to deposit a check and the thought of actually having to interact with strangers is petrifying.
At this point, your awkwardness has become full blown social anxiety. But let me tell you, there is hope for you and you are not alone on this weird socially inept journey.
Awkward people have been thriving for centuries and this is how:
Acceptance. This is who you are, and the more you try to focus on changing yourself, the more anxious you'll become. Everyone gets a little nervous when they talk to someone attractive. I've stepped on about a thousand heels in my life and said some barely coherent apology and I'm still alive. Yes, it may seem that some girls just float through life without every experiencing the kind of crippling fear of embarrassment that we do. Maybe they really do, or maybe they're just really good at hiding it. The best way to get over your social awkwardness is to try to be as social as possible. Join a club. talk to that cute boy in your chemistry lab. If things go wrong, no one will remember it in the morning. Don't spend too much time trying to fix yourself in the mirror, you look fine. Your world will not end with a bad haircut or a pimple on your nose. I promise.
Get Help. If your inability to connect with others has so greatly impacted your life you feel completely lost. you are absolutely not alone. Social anxiety is nothing to be ashamed of because so many people deal with it at some point in their lives. There are people you can talk to, medications you can take, and ways to improve your life. You just have to take the first step. Go to the doctor. See a therapist. Tell someone that you're struggling. There will be good days and there will be bad ones but if you take the necessary steps your good days can definitely outweigh the good.
Get uncomfortable. That's right, if you really want to be able to do new things you have to start somewhere, you just got to do them. Reach out to a new friend, ask someone out on a date, call someone you haven't talked to for awhile. Every time you get out of your comfort zone, you're working towards making that zone just a little broader. Go to your local coffee shop by yourself, order your favorite drink, and bring your favorite book to read. There is a whole world out there that you don't have to miss just because you're scared of messing up!
And above all else, love yourself! recognize the uniqueness of your own mind and body and appreciate that you're different from others, even if it seems like you're the only one who does. You will meet all kinds of people during your lifetime and you will find you're not so different than you think!
