I don't even remember the first time I stepped on a plane, but I do remember that it wasn't until I was 18 years old that I stopped throwing up on planes. Living with a flying phobia has never been easy, but as I get older, I'm becoming more and more accustomed to it. I now fly many times a month; and guess what?! I'm still alive!

While I do still get scared on planes, I've learned to be comfortable with feeling this way. So comfortable that I sleep through most flights nowadays. What used to be excruciating is now a positive learning experience. I've grown so much from confronting this fear that, now, I am actually grateful to have this opportunity to frequently practice courage. If you are one of 20 million Americans who suffer from flight phobia, consider these tools that have helped me enourmously:

1. When making travel plans, use your logic; don't let your fears determine your choices.
2. View every flying experience as an opportunity to practice using adrenaline rather than fighting it.
3. Do not call the adrenaline 'anxiety'; call it 'energy' or 'excitement'.
4. Listen to music and imagine the turbulence being a dance to the music.
5. Stretch regularly to release all the parts of your body that you've been clenching tight.
6. Remember to breathe; it's actually really easy to forget this!
7. Be aware of your body language and actively change it to that of a confident strong person.
8. As soon as you catch yourself looking forward to being back on the ground, redirect your focus to the present moment and its opportunity.
9. When you're jumping to conclusions and envisioning a fatal plane crash, look at the beautiful scenery you see along the way. Think about it: very few people get to see such gorgeous scenery when they die!
10. Tell yourself what you don't want to hear: this is NOT within your control and you've got to accept it.
11. Choose to look forward to turbulence as an opportunity to practice courage.
12. Learn to separate your physical and emotional experience from logical reasoning.
13. Find something that is more powerful than the fear of death. Find it, and own it.
14. Value courage over your own life; you've got to accept the worst case scenario and care about being courageous more than you fear that scenario.
15. Don't judge yourself for being scared of something you know is safe. You can know logically that flying is the safest method of transportation, but still be terrified emotionally. And that's ok.

Here's the big concept: do not get rid of fear, but simply add courage. By resisting fear, you just give it more power over you. Don't even wish for it to go away. Rather, your simple quest should be to add courage, so that the experience of being anxious is familiar to you and doesn't shatter you anymore. Prove to yourself that your courage is stronger than these fears. Don't allow your fear to convince you to avoid airplanes or other situations that make you uncomfortable. If something is uncomfortable, it's a sign that there's an opportunity for growth.

Here's something to consider: being anxious doesn't make you weak. If you weren't afraid, you wouldn't have the opportunity to be courageous. Because frankly, there is no courage without fear. The strongest people are those, who experience horrendous fears and obstacles, but run towards the roar, look the obstacle straight in the eye and keep going anyways. If you are an anxious person, just remember that you have the power to become the most courageous human being you know; and that, believe it or not, IS within your control!