How can I meet a bae organically? AKA not Tinder

Dear Miss/Mister Knows Right from Left,

The way to meet a bae without Tinder... start with the old fashioned and uber popular, but sometimes underused "Hi." Follow it with a flirty/cute smile, then BAM! Love at first smile.

Might as well give it a try.



"Marry me?"


"Merryyyy Christmas... That's what I meant"

*awkward funny laughs ensue*

(I've been watching too many romantic comedies.)

If you're not in a rom com, I can still give some advice. This is for meeting people in real life. No phones or computers. The thing to do really is to say "Hi! or Hey. or Hi :) " Or at least introduce yourself and get talking to people that you're attracted to. If you never make conversation with them, then a romance won't blossom. Love at first sight is not like in the movies. You're not going to get a marriage proposal after a weekend together. Hehe.

You should definitely try some "simple" things like smiling at someone you think is cute, starting a conversation with someone you see all the time but never introduced yourself to, saying hi to people and being confident about it, making eye contact with people you're attracted to, and all that. I put simple in quotation marks because I know that it takes a lot of courage to do those things I listed. Maybe start one by one. I'll make you a list and you can check them off.

1. Smile at someone you think is cute.

Not one of those "I give this smile to all strangers" smiles though.

2. Start a conversation with someone you see around all the time but never talked to

Hey I recognize you from [blah blah blah]! I'm Cindy Lou Who.


*proceed with random question*

How are you [liking you classes]? How is [the food at the cafeteria today]? What [did I miss in class]? Do you [know what time it is]? etc...

3. Be confident in saying hi to people that you find attractive (Assuming you did #1 on the list)

4. Make eye contact with people you're attracted to

5. Hopefully, by now, you've made a new friend, possibly a new romance, or both.

Essentially, if you don't want to rely on Tinder, then you've got to start having those Tinder convos in real life. No more messages from phone screens to start a conversation, but words that come from your mouth, or smiles that are in 3D.

If you're having trouble meeting people, you should go to more events around you. Go to that game your friends are going to, or hint to a friend that "Jimmy John is SO HOT." Maybe your friend can set up a date!

Also, it isn't very uncommon for people to use social media nowadays to continue a conversation. After you've organically met this bae of yours, maybe you haven't gotten a chance to get his or her number. I've had a couple friends message people on Facebook, after they had already met in person, to keep talking and exchange numbers. They are still in their respective relationships.


Every person is different, so every relationship may start out differently.

Definitely give "hi" a try though. I mean, what if you run out of cellular data and have no wifi???? Tinder can't save you then.

Your bae will come someday.

If anyone gives my list a try, give me updates through my Ask Jack(ie) link :) If something awkward happens, you'll just have another funny story to add to your awesomeness.

Have confidence in yourself to start meaningful conversations with people! You can do it!

If you need an outside perspective on something, or just want to share something with me, feel free to use this link to submit a question or comment.