It’s the time of year where many young adults are transitioning to a lifestyle completely different than the one they’ve been used to. To some, it’s their chance to party and be crazy without their parents to punish or criticize them.
To others, it’s a start at a career that they’ve been dreaming of since they were little kids. Whatever the case may be, going to college is a lot like moving, leaving everything behind to start a new life with new people, new experiences, and new mistakes. Now, everyone knows of the cliché high school sweethearts who fall in love before they even step foot on a college campus. While there are those who hold these relationships in low regard, they do exist and carry on past high school and into college.
But unless your very lucky and end up going to the same University as your significant other, there exists the difficult situation of two barely-of-age people attempting a long-distance relationship. If you are brave enough to attempt this endeavor, there are a few things to keep in mind in order to maintain a healthy relationship, and a healthy college life.
Firstly, you can’t let your insecurities get the best of you. Sure, it sounds cute to tell your significant other that you don’t know how you got so lucky to have them, but in terms of college this can lead to many painful things: Depression, jealousy, anxiety, loneliness. It is important to recognize your own self-worth and that the other person is equally as lucky to have you, as you are them. Secondly is learning to divide time in a way that both people are comfortable with, so that no one feels ignored or uncared for.
College is a lot of work, and there is hardly a free moment. In high school, maybe you were used to the two of you texting back and forth all through class, meeting up and kissing goodbye in passing periods, and hanging out on the weekends. But college is much more crucial and time consuming, especially since college students essentially take care of and look after themselves. It’s important to have contact and devote some time to the other person at least once a day if possible, but the quantity-over-quality conversation practiced in high school, has to be reversed so that your college and personal life don’t clash and threaten the security of one or the other.
Lastly, it is crucial to get involved with college in a positive way, so that your time spent there is not just classwork and girlfriend/boyfriend. Extra-curricular activities create a social life and open up new relationships with piers, ones you will cherish for life. So if you can’t stand to see them having a good time without you, or need constant attention throughout the day, or only get through the week only to get an hour or two with them, put the relationship on pause. If you don’t feel you have the time for them, find that you don’t love them as much as you thought, or see your grades sipping as a result of trying to cater to them, put the relationship on pause.
You will have your whole lives to reconnect and get married and start a beautiful life. But College is a huge investment, and a privilege to get to attend. And while adults do come back to college, the most beneficial and impressionable time is right now, while your young and eager to get started. Through love, caring, understanding and balance, colligate relationship can survive, and even blossom into something more beautiful than you could ever imagine.
