Pain is something that nobody looks forward to, but as long as we are living and breathing, we must experience this undesirable sensation. Pain is necessary; it's a reminder that we are, in fact, alive.
I have noticed over years of observing that most people run from pain. While that would be the instinctive reaction to anything that is unpleasant, if we learn to embrace pain, it will fade faster, and strength and healing will come sooner. God is saying, "Take this reminder that you're alive. You're breathing. The pain you feel is you fighting back against whatever struggle you're up against." He gives us gifts in disguise, and I honestly believe that pain is one of those blessings. He only gives us things in which he knows we can handle.
Sometimes in the middle of a struggle, we begin to think thoughts like, "I can't handle this" or "I'm not strong enough to bear this pain." Get rid of those thoughts because they are nothing but lies. You can get through it and you will. You may need help along the way so never be scared to reach out for that, because sometimes it's necessary.
You and your mind are so much stronger than you realize. Think about weightlifting. When we lift weights, it strains our muscles, resulting in pain. But while we feel the strain and pain in our muscles, they are growing stronger behind the scenes; it is the same as emotional pain and strengthening.
Based on my own personal experience, I have always been one to be in a relationship. I had two serious relationships that lasted almost all of high school. So when the last one ended, I wasn't okay. I didn't quite know how to be okay being alone. I knew I could get there, but I wasn't there yet. I accepted the fact that it was going to be a process until I could be by myself contentedly. I chose to accept that healing is a process and not a flip of a switch, probably one of the best decisions I have ever made. I was gentle and patient with myself. I let myself cry when I needed, I let myself rest when it was required, and I praised myself on the small steps towards becoming the "happy, confident girl" I was once known as again.
You must allow yourself however much time you need to grieve. You must be patient with yourself. You must be proud of the small steps you make towards emotional recovery. You must love yourself enough to become your own biggest support system, your own best friend.
Whatever the struggle or fight you're up against, you must be confident in the fact that you will overcome it in time, but it is okay to embrace the pain and let it strengthen you. Charles Kingsley, an English priest and novelist, once said, "Pain is no evil, unless it conquers us." Pain is not the enemy, it is simply an unpleasant aid to the solution.
It is okay to not be okay. It is okay to embrace pain. We will heal, we will overcome.
