"No."
I can honestly say this is my least favorite word.
It always has been: I think back to early memories of being a toddler strolling around Walmart, begging my parents for yet another bouncy ball and them replying with "no."
Or asking them for ice cream past eight o'clock on a school night: "no."
Or for a Myspace account at 10 years old: "no."
Or to go to my first high school party: "no."

In the long run, a lot of these "no"s were out of concern for my well being, or to teach a younger version of myself some sort of discipline.
In the long run, I can now say I am truly grateful for all the times they have replied to my momentary desires with no, because overall, they could see a bigger picture- a picture that I was far too small both physically and mentally to even begin to focus on.

So what about when we ask God for something, and in return, He says "no"? What about when we are praying for something we desperately want to happen, for a miracle we have been begging for?
Some of the worst "no"s that I feel I have ever gotten, were from prayers that I sent up to God, that didn't work out exactly as I asked for them to.
It was like, I would give Him the instructions and everything, and I'd think to myself: "Look big man, I know you're busy and all, so I have laid out every detail for you on how to fix this: just work your magic, and I will be on my way, okay?"

When I lived by this sort of thought process in the past, I spent very long periods of time discouraged. For a while even, God and I were not on speaking terms because I was so hurt by the amount of time and pain it took for things to just be okay again. To just feel settled again, in the way I wanted them to happen.

Through some of these experiences, these are some of the things I have learned from prayers that seemed to go unanswered: this is what I learned to do to get God to start saying "Yes" instead of "No."

1. Understand that God doesn't really ever say "no" to a heartfelt prayer.

Our God is not some one who is hateful; He is not even someone who wishes terrible things upon His people. The earth has been a flawed place since Adam and Eve, and sadly, as humans we are plagued with all sorts of evil in our time here. It isn't ever that God is trying to deny us of a happy ending, or that He is allowing terrible things to take place in our lives; its not that He is saying "no," it's that He is saying, "just wait."

2. When He asks us to wait, it is because He has better things in store for us.

Just like I mentioned earlier, as younger versions of ourselves, we never truly saw the bigger picture that those older and wiser than us could see. The same applies to when we think we know best about a situation, when in reality, God is the only one who truly knows what the best plan for our lives is.

3. While waiting, try changing what you are asking for.

After realizing that no matter how hard I pushed, how much I prayed, or how much I bargained for a certain outcome to God and it wouldn't happen, I was forced to pray for something that brought me much more peace, and gave me a whole new sense of patience- I prayed for understanding. Even when I couldn't find understanding, I prayed for acceptance.

If I could call myself a Christian, and I could gather the strength to ask God for an outcome I had created myself as a flawed human being, then I needed to have the faith to back that up. Having faith means to blindly trust in God, without needing physical proof- for me this meant, even when things didn't end up going my way, I had to remember that God is still good, will always be good, and He works all things for the best case scenario. Praying for these things pacified myself until the best outcome was reached- even if that outcome wasn't what I wanted in the first place. Everything happens for a reason, and we can only use our experiences for His glory. He will work goodness through you just so long as you allow Him to.

His outcomes have made me who I am, and who you are- and that is a person who is on their path to do great things for a God who is even greater.
That is the person who is so unconditionally loved and valued by Him, that He gave His only Son to die for us: an outcome I'm sure that He wished didn't have to happen, and that caused Him pain- but happened anyway in order for the best case scenario: so we may all know of the eternal love He has for us.