We all have that one friend. The one who you're only friends with because they're friends with all of your friends. You don't love them, you don't even necessarily like them, but you have to be around them all of the time because you have the same friends. It's easy to feel trapped in a relationship with someone you don't really click with when you risk losing your other friends. Here's how to escape that relationship and find true, meaningful friendships.
Stop seeking their approval. It's as simple as that. Stop trying to be impressive in their eyes. Stop trying to be someone they would be jealous of. Stop worrying so much about what they think of you. Stop trying to out-dress them and out-think them. They're not your friend and they're not your enemy. At the end of the day, they don't care whether you succeed or fail. Why try so hard to impress them when they don't care one way or the other? Once you stop worrying about what they think of you, it becomes so much easier to be around them. You no longer feel anxious about what you eat, the car you drive, or the clothes you wear. They're not your true friend so don't give them the satisfaction of controlling your life.
Talk to them. There is no harm in admitting that you don't get along. If you know it, they know it, and your friends know it; there is no reason you can't say it out loud. You don't have to be their best friend and they don't have to be yours. If you're scared you will lose the friends you share then find a way to make peace with the person who pushes you away from your friends.
Odds are this person probably reminds you a lot of yourself and that's why you don't get along. They're probably just as tense and anxious around you as you are around them. You may be neck-in-neck with this person and feel pressure to win certain arguments or have certain friends on your side. Not only is that toxic to yourself, it's harmful to the friendships that you are trying not to lose. Don't make your friends choose.
Accept that you two were not meant to be close friends. If you were supposed to be BFF's you'd have friendship bracelets by now. Accept that they're not your best friend and the situation immediately becomes more tolerable. You have other friends. You have a best friend. Even when you feel like this other person is taking your best friend away from you, they're not. The relationship you have with your best friend and their relationship with your best friend is completely different and that is a very good thing. You will not lose your best friend because they occasionally go to dinner with this other person and don't invite you.
We all have that one person we are forced to call our "friend." You don't have to like them, you don't have to be their best friend, but you have to find a way to be around them. By accepting that you will never be best friends, ending all competitiveness between the two of you, and not seeking their approval, you are taking the control they have over your life away and making it a better situation for everyone.
