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Friendships

How To Deal With Distance

Heading your separate ways doesn't have to mean separating for good.

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How To Deal With Distance
Photo by Jillian Hansen.

As a first-year in college, I've made a bunch of new friends. It's a completely new environment, filled with new people and new experiences. While you certainly don't want to miss out, you also don't want to forget about the friends you may be leaving behind. But how do you reconcile your new and old social lives?

Truth be told, there's not really an easy answer. Friendships are two-way streets; you need to put in effort in order to maintain a lasting and loving relationship with your friends. However, there is a hugely beneficial mindset at play. Once you realize it, holding your friends close even though they may be far away will become much easier.

The idea is simple: you have your social life, your friends have theirs. As long as you recognize the importance of giving your friend the breathing room necessary, you allow him or her to flourish on their own by finding another niche. These niches of friendship and other relationships are not mutually exclusive. You can have a set of friends in one niche and still have a completely different set of friends in another.

If you don't allow for your friend to grow in their own way, you end up smothering them. Don't get stuck trying to recreate the past when it no longer applies! Take, for instance, my relationship with my best friend. We've been best friends all throughout high school. As such, we saw each other almost every single day for all of four years. We never got sick of each other, but we did see each other quite often. Now, we're attending different institutions. She's an hour south of me, so we get to see each other about once or twice a month. That's a huge difference as compared to our high school career, but our friendship still works! It all depends on maturity. If you're mature enough to recognize the fact that your friends can have other friends other than you, you're a step closer to keeping that strong relationship. If you're mature enough to be able to survive without seeing your friends every single day for hours on end, you're another step closer.

Sometimes, it is a struggle to get used to the change. Instead of trying to emulate the past, look forward to and embrace the future! Remember the good old times fondly, but don't let those memories take over and prevent you from growing with your friends as time passes.

Good friends will love you from any distance. Make sure you do the same for them!

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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