Tell them that you'll make more money and support the family better than you would as a doctor. Remind your Asian, conservative parent who sees the measure of your worth as a human being in whether you can make them look good to their friends and at cocktail parties that you can make them even prouder by following your passions.
When your Asian parents call following your passions a "white person thing," remind them that you're not a machine and that you don't exist just to make them proud and satisfy their desires. When they chew you out for asserting your own independence and living your own life, remind them that you are not simply a proxy for their dreams.
When they express their anger that you're living your own life rather than doing what they want you to do, remind your Asian parents that not becoming a doctor is not the engineer does not mean you're a failure. When your strict Asian parent threatens to beat you due to not wanting to become a doctor, remind them that you're stronger than them and can very easily kick their ass if you wanted to, and putting your hands on your parent is only a last resort option. Despite how much it might be a lie, remind your strict Asian parent that their anger or disappointment doesn't have power over you.
When your strict Asian parent says you've been ungrateful, remind your Asian parents were never grateful enough to their kids to say "I love you." Tell your really strict Asian parent that you never actually wanted to play the violin or the piano and you just did it because they told you to. Tell your strict Asian parent that you spent your whole life trying not to be like them and straight up just didn't like how they would compare you to other kids like you were some commodity for status.
To tell your strict Asian parent you don't want to be a doctor, realize that nothing you can say can make them any less upset and disappointed than they are. Recognize their sacrifices to you, but know that you're not beholden to them and letting them control you means that you're regressing into your old self just trying to make your parents happy.
Tell your parents that you've outgrown your stage of trying to make them happy, that you're the way they raised you seriously fucked you up. When your strict Asian parents want to beat your ass for not wanting to become a doctor, if they put a hand on you, submit them and let them know that you're your own person and you're not going to abide by their bullshit. That will surely change their minds.
When your Asian parents threaten to disown you, tell them that they never really loved you in the first place. When they try to compare you to your siblings and other families' kids they would rather have as their children, Remind your really strict Asian parents that your friends who aren't Asian don't have parents that try to control their lives.
Ultimately, resist the idea that there might be nothing you can do to resist your parents' decision. Try every method you can and try to change your strict Asian parents' minds.
