“Oh my gosh, you’re the oldest of 5! “I am sure you’re such a great role model!”
I cannot tell you how many times I have heard this seemingly harmless statement. When I was in elementary school I would simply blush, smile and wave at this comment. When I was in middle school I would roll my eyes and most likely respond with an overly dramatic and incredibly rude phrase complete with a “yeah, whatever.” When I was in high school I was shocked at how people could even see me as “a role model.” Honestly.
To put this in perspective, I once considered popping a boys car tires for having the audacity, and in my opinion, the stupidity to not text me back. Every math grade I got was brutally below average and I had more ear piercings than literally anyone I had ever met. “Someone get this girl a glass of wine,” is the only response I have for my mature choices. Is this the type of person you would refer to as a role model?
When you’re the “oldest” your subject to a notion that inherently suggests your mature or wise. However, lets just say in my case, I am so far from mature AND wise it’s on the verge of me needing a personal assistant. Being happy, go lucky, loud, random and emotionally unpredictable are qualities I would use to explain someone constantly embarrassing herself in classroom setting, not someone to set an “example.” Let’s also just make it very clear that my younger sister is not only more mature, but if we are being honest, more sane than me in a variety of ways.
She is not only driven, determined and motivated. But she is also, serious, on time, and licensed; three things I am sadly not. Having a younger sister who is more mature, than me has allowed me to love everything about her because they are qualities I do not posses. My sister Bella’s structure and stability allows me to explore my more creative and adapted version of role modeling. It allows me to be outgoing, bold, brave and my own reinvented idea of a role model.
I do not need to be perfect to be a role model. I know what I want and I go for it, even though the decision is almost never calculated, or though out. I can be clueless, which I am. I can blow up a microwave, which I have. I can hit a parked car in a parking lot, which I have also done, and I can still be a “role model.” My 4 siblings support me and support my erratic and spontaneous nature which has taught me more about myself and allowed me to recognize my status as a permanent "rolemodel."
