1. Send yourself flowers.

2. Buy yourself chocolates.

3. Wait approximately three days post-Vday and grab as many half-off chocolates as your arms can hold.

4. Clip your toenails.

5. Paint your toenails.

6. Paint every toenail a different shade of pink to ensure you're in the holiday spirit.

7. Watch Valentine's Day.

8. Throw the chocolates you're eating at the TV every time Ashton Kutcher appears on the screen, looking perfect in his cute little florist delivery man outfit.

9. Watch The Notebook.

10. Watch Dear John.

11. Watch every episode of every television show ever on Netflix.

12. Watch Secret Life of the American Teenager and laugh at how annoying, boring, and pregnant Amy Juergens can get a boyfriend and you can't.

13. Cuddle with your stuffed animal.

14. Cuddle with your childhood blanket.

15. Celebrate "Galentine's Day."

16. Go out with your girlfriends.

17. See Fifty Shades of Grey with your girlfriends.

18. Scoff at the gooey, romantic couples out with their actual significant others.

19. Think about how weird it is that actual couples are out to see Fifty Shades of Grey together, on Valentine's Day.

20. Go to dinner alone. 

21. Order a pitcher of sangria for yourself.

22. Finish the entire pitcher of sangria by yourself.

23. Online shop.

24. Test-drive your comfiest fuzzy socks.

25. Order cheesy bread.

26. Specifically remember to order the special edition heart-shaped cheesy bread.

27. Proudly finish all of said cheesy bread.

28. Remind yourself that you're awesome. It's a stupid holiday anyway.