Now before you start calling me a feminazi, hold up. I want equality for men too. Both men and women face stereotypes and unfair expectations of gender roles. As much as I’d like to fight to get rid of these gender roles for women, I also think that men shouldn’t be faced with them either.
An argument that a lot of men make when women talk about sexism and the oppression of women is that men are oppressed too and are held to standards of masculinity and objectified as well. When women talk about the high rates of rape and sexual violence against women, some men will argue back that men are raped too and are less likely to report it because of fear of ridicule or of losing their masculinity. When women talk about how women are being objectified in media and are being held to unrealistic beauty standards, some men will argue back that there are physical standards that society places on men as well.
These men aren't wrong, but they're fighting the wrong fight and belittling women's fights for equality. It doesn't have to be an either/or system. Although I do believe women face a greater amount of oppression than men, this argument has a greater problem. The real enemy of these misguided men is the patriarchy, not so called "feminazis." Fighting against the patriarchy is fighting to break these stereotypes for men and women. Feminists aren’t doing anything to restrict men’s rights or trying to keep men in their gender roles. They are trying to break down a system that oppresses freedom of expression and divergence of gender roles, and it isn't only for women.
See, the patriarchy started as a way to define gender roles very strictly. There was a time in history where almost all societies were more egalitarian. When societies were hunter-gatherer ones and men and women both shared the work equally. This changed over time and was marked significantly in western culture how supposedly different men and women were and the power men had over women. Women seemed to be "the other" and "non-men" versus being a part of humankind.
This separation created certain expectations of both men and women. Men were strong, intelligent, and insensitive. Women were weak, uneducated, and emotional. Men were soldiers, leaders, providers. Women were mothers, housewives, trophies.
Both men and women had to fit into these roles that were placed on them and if they wouldn’t, they were ostracized, harassed, hurt, or jailed depending on the level of divergence.
This has gotten better certainly, but that doesn't mean that it's not still hard for men or women to break out of these gender roles without repercussions.
Some of the men that continue to hate feminists may not understand the good that can come for men through equality. They may think women are just fighting for themselves, but this fight is about everyone and for everyone.
Men and women need to work together to break down the patriarchy so that these expectations aren't placed on anyone.
