I have not experienced much pain or suffering in my life, and therefore cannot speak from experience on how to overcome it and endure it. But with two grandmas who have been battling cancer for about a year, and the other a few years, I can only share with you what they have shared with me as an encouragement for dealing with their pain.

GRANDMA APPLE

This is my mother’s mother, who taught me how to make bread and let us pick from her orange tree when she and my grandpa moved to Florida. She makes the best cinnamon rolls in the world and she is one of the most God-fearing women I know. Here is her story:

“I was first diagnosed with bladder cancer on February 27, 2012 when I went to ER at Waterman Hospital, Tavares, FL, because of hemorrhaging from my bladder. A CT Scan showed two large tumors. I was sent home later that night with a Foley catheter, which I had until I could see a Urologist. This began a series of appointments, scrapings, surgeries to remove the tumors, routine Cystoscopies, and treatments over the next 4 years. The type of cancer I have is a high grade, but slow growing.

I have had a total of 3 different treatments. One set in 2012, another in 2014, and again 2016. This is because of the persistence of recurring cancers. Twice I have had BCG Chemo Therapy, which is a live Tuberculosis bacteria inserted into the bladder. Its work is to kill all the bad cells, but it also kills many good cells. The first treatment was interrupted half way through because of a National shortage. This put a 6 week delay between treatment 3 and 4. After finding more cancer in 2014, another set of 6 treatments were given. However, the BCG serum was still a shortage, so the next best was given, which was Mitomycin C. This was not as harsh a treatment and my body took it well. However, it did not kill the cancer, and in May of 2016 I was diagnosed with two more tumors. This giving me a grand total of 7 over the 4 years.

In June of 2016 the BCG Serum became available when I needed it, and I was able to have 5 treatments. The reason I only had 5 treatments was because the serum kicked in and did what it had to do in 5 treatments.

The treatments are somewhat unpleasant, but doable. However, there were certain procedures to do at home for the next 8 hours. Often the next day would leave me feeling fatigued and slightly ill. What I didn’t know, and I’m thankful I didn’t, is what was ahead of me for the next 6 weeks, and still ongoing.

When I first found out I had cancer, I was sort of in a state of fatigue, having lost so much blood, plus it was late at night. I don’t remember being overwhelmed, or fearful. What I do remember is a washing of total peace that came over me. This I knew right away came from my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. That same night in the ER, the hope of a cure was also whispered into my ears from an ER nurse, who told me her dad had bladder cancer at one time, and was cured through treatments.

The following day it was time to share this news with our family, which was difficult, because I did not want to worry them. However, they needed to know. After that I shared the same news with many friends. Everyone promised to pray for me/us. It was a great comfort to know that so many people cared and were praying.

The peace continued as we moved forward with the necessary steps of healing in the weeks ahead. I had complete peace and hope in God’s Sovereignty all the way through it. Even though I had no guarantees of a cure, I just took the next step, trusting Him in every decision.

Having gone through this continuing battle for over four years, I realize what it means to be on the receiving end of the concerns and prayers of others. I also know that even though I have many supporters, and prayer warriors, it is only me who walks through that doctor visit, surgery, recovery or treatment. However, with Christ as my Savior, it isn’t just me, it is us. Jesus and me, and He is all I need.

He is my hope, my strength, my joy, my continued peace. I can trust Him. It is not because of a cure I trust Him, it is because of what He did for me on the Cross. Even if I should die, from cancer or by any other means, my future is secure in Him. I know where I will spend eternity. In Heaven with Jesus!

The encouragement of others is a great gift. Where would any of us be without people who genuinely care about us. Care enough to write, text, send cards, make phone calls and offer words of comfort, and verbal prayers. Having been on the receiving end, I know the joy it brings to know someone really cares about me, so I try to be that way for others. My prayer life has grown knowing what a comfort it is to have others praying for me. So, I desire to make it a priority to do the same for others as their needs arise.

My view of God as I move through this cancer is this: He is in this with me all the way. He knows exactly what is going on and what I need. He will never leave me. He is always available. I base this fact on the truth of Psalm 139, which I fell in love with during the late 1990’s. I love the Psalms, especially those of David, because they were written by a man with major issues. David poured out his heart to God. He wasn’t afraid to tell God how he felt. However, the bottom line was always, BUT I WILL TRUST IN YOU!

In the past two months, for the first time in my life, I have experienced what seems like unending pain, pain that lets up with the help of drugs for a short time, but keeps coming back. Pain that has robbed me of sleep for 6 weeks now. I have cried out to God like the Psalmist many times in these weeks. However, my ending prayer is always the same. BUT I WILL TRUST IN YOU LORD. I know He has me in His hands. Whatever His plan is for me, may not be my choice, however my desire is to be used by Him to be a Light to those around me. That others will see Christ in me and as me, what is the reason for the hope that you have. At that time, I will give the Lord glory due his Name."

GRANDMA NO POOL

She used to be called “Grandma Pool,” but since she got rid of her pool she is now “Grandma No Pool.” I remember countless times in the summer would be spent in her pool and she would make us food and slushies to keep cool. Her thanksgiving food is to die for, and she and my grandpa were my biggest fans in high school sports. She has always sought to encourage me in everything I do. Here is her story:

“I started having spells for about a year where I would feel faint and weak and would have to sit down for about 10 minutes so they would go away. My doctor told me that we would get to the bottom of it. Along with that came several doctors, tests and medicines and finally after about 9 months I was diagnosed with cancerous Carcinoid tumors in the liver. Cancer never even crossed my mind as a possibility with the symptoms that I had. He explained that Carcinoid tumors are quite rare, always very small, hard to find and diagnose and emit off a small amount of cancer. When the doctor told me about this I was relieved that they did find a diagnosis and I knew that God was with me and would walk me through it. As the testing continued, I found out that it was Stage 4 cancer, the tumors I had in the liver were very large and could not be killed.....only controlled with a special type of radiation. I was also told that I had this for well over 10 years. That made me look back on my life and look for possible symptoms. Carcinoids do not react to chemo, therefore they can only shrink them with the radiation. I asked the doctor if my only hope was a miracle from God, and he said "yes".

I was determined to pray for a miracle and encouraged by my son to let others know so they could pray also. There were many people praying for me along with many that I didn't even know. I was so thankful for each of those prayers and knew that I was not alone. It drew me closer to God, and my devotions and prayer life became much more intense. I remember one time I asked God to hold my hand, What an awesome experience to feel God's hand wrapped around mine.

So far, I have had 2 of the specialized radiation treatments and don"t expect any more. After the last one it showed on a test that they are starting to shrink. Praise God!!

I also had a 24 hr. period of God's miracles. I know a couple that grew up in the Congo and are now missonaries there. We ran into each other one day and she was so excited to see me because God had told her the day before that she had to pray with me. She got up the next morning and once again God told her she had to pray with me. (She knew nothing of my health problems). I then told her about it and she stood right where we were and prayed for me with our heads and hands locked together.. This was God's miracle telling me that He was with me and brought tears every time I thought about it, I also talked to my nephew who is a lung doctor and he said that he has had 3 patients with Carcinoid tumors. He proceeded to explain that you can't kill them but he gave me the hope of possibly living several years by their controlling their growth. Another miracle!

At this point I look at my future as having a booster shot every 28 days, continued MRI's and CT scans, continued doctor visits and blood tests. God has taken away all of my symptoms, I keep praising Him for that. I'm able to eat any kind of food, which was not the case the last 15 years and sharing God's love and faithfulness with others for what He has done for me. I don't know what the long future will be, but I do know that God is going before me, walking with me and giving me more energy every day. I look at the things in the world that always appeared to be so important and realize that they don't mean anything. Jesus is the most important person in my life and it is only through Him that I will live forever. If He decides that He wants me to leave this earth, I am ready to follow. I said right from the beginning of this journey that "either way I am a winner".

God has been so faithful and showing His love in so many ways. Cancer has changed my life, my outlook on what is really important and showing me that I need to promote His Kingdom wherever I can. I look to the future as sharing Jesus with others as much as I can.”

My Grandmas are strong women. They are strong because He is strong. I am so thankful for their testimonies, and I hope that someday I can be even a sliver of who they are.