Relationships, especially serious, long, and committed ones, are more rare these days. With the hookup culture nowadays, it is hard to tell what a person is in it for. You spend all your life wondering "Is this the one?" or "Is there even a one?" Honestly, who knows at this age, but I can assure you that there is such a thing as love and a healthy, serious relationship. But how do you know you have found love or a serious, committed relationship? There may not be a definite answer, but there are for sure little signs that indicate it's real.
The first thing I noticed about my relationship that was different from my past relationships was the fact the he was interested in my future. It is important in relationships that the other person cares just as much about your happiness and success as you do. How do they show they care? They can ask a lot of questions about what you want in life, what is important to you, and what your goals are. If you have a big day ahead of you, they can support you when they wish you luck or ask how it was. It could be as simple as a good luck text that morning or an attempt to make you feel better if you did not do well on a test. They want you to succeed and, even more, they want to be a part of the journey.
Having grown up in an Italian household, I was always taught family values and that family comes first. My mom, who always stressed this idea, made him meet my family on our first date. I, for sure, thought it was over before it even began. She invited my grandmother, aunts, uncles, and cousins. At the end of the night I expected him to tell me that it was too overwhelming, but he admitted that he had had a good time. It is important that they care about the relationships you have with your family and friends. They should not want to get in the way of the other relationships you have. In fact, they should strive to get approval from your friends and family as it is a good foundation for a healthy relationship.
As much as it is hard to admit and difficult to deal with, arguing is good for a relationship. No, I am not talking about the 'make up' that follows. As a person in a long distance relationship, I am no stranger to arguing. You can learn a lot about another person when they disagree with you. You can tell how much they care and if they are willing to fight for you. Always giving in and saying sorry is not the best thing for a relationship as it can cause a bigger issue in the long run. If they do not go down without a fight, it reveals that they are confident with their beliefs and comfortable with who they are. They challenge you and making you a better person. It also can prove whether or not they can admit when they are wrong. If they are real with you, then that is an indication that they take the relationship seriously and are themselves with you.
It is an investment. OK, I know how superficial that sounds, but it is somewhat true. It took three months for my boyfriend to officially ask me out, and, at the time, it made me furious. Looking back on it now, I could not be happier with it as it is more reassuring than ever. It proved to me that it was not just another fling to him, and that he was thinking about more than just the instant gratification. Taking it slow and not jumping the gun can indicate that they take the relationship seriously and want it to last.
Have I found true love? Who knows? But, I do know that I have found someone who cares about me, my future, and our relationship, and I would not change that for the world.
