I was always mistaken as a shy and introverted person during my adolescent years. Partially because I was too afraid to put in my opinion because I have always worried what people thought about me. I tried my best to fit in, and not to stand out. I was always a follower, because leading was a fear of mine. I just wanted to blend in as best as I could with the others.
On the flip side, when I was with my friends I was always considered the loud, fun, and talkative one. I just could not bring her to school because I was scared of what people would say when the real side of me would enter a class. So, I just sat back and did not talk.
Having everyone like me is one of my goals in life, and I know it is un realistic and you cannot please everyone, but I still try.
I vividly remember my junior year english teacher telling me to speak up because he could not hear anything I was saying when I would have to read a paragraph out loud in front of everyone. He then proceeded to tell the class I was the quietest person he ever met. I had two close friends in that class that knew me and they knew I would not bring myself to talk in there. The sad thing is I was afraid of that class because it had all the "popular" people in every seat. I was afraid of them, and I did not want to be talked about in their little cliques.
Senior year I got a little better with the real me. I would talk more and more in my classes. I was not embarrassed to read a paragraph that I got called on to read. I started feeling more confident in myself, but I still held back a lot. And, looking at my high school years now as a sophomore in college I regret not speaking up and showing everyone the real me.
As I entered freshman year I did not want to be that mistaken shy girl that everyone in high school knew. I wanted to be involved and I wanted my voice to be heard. I did get a little nervous raising my hand the first time to answer a question, but after that it was like a second nature to me. I finally showed my strengths in classes, and even though I have weaknesses the people around me did not seem to pick up on them, because we are all in this together. I took a public speaking class, and my class told me I was one of the best public speakers in the class and if that is not a confident booster I do not know what is.
As I entered sophomore year I felt stronger, confident, and ready to tackle this place again. I introduce myself to people when they seem nervous walking into a new class, I speak my opinions, and I do NOT let people walk all over me. That shy girl that was trapped in an extroverted body is not here anymore. My friends actually have to tell me to be quiet because I talk so much, and I do not even care because I love to talk. Personally, I believe one of my biggest strengths is being a good talker. I am easy to talk to, and I love talking one on one to people about anything.
I am thankful that entering college changed the way I present myself. Yes, I might still get nervous and care a little bit of what people think about me. But, I am my true self now, and I do not have a lot of fears about showing my true self that I did in high school. I am proud of the progress I have made about my confidence, and I only hope to continuing becoming more confident in myself and showing everyone who I really am.
