If you would've met me in high school compared to now; you would tell me that I'm a different person. Not a completely different person, but a person who has changed. And though I'm aware that we, as people, tend to change overtime. We can change for the good and sometimes the bad. But personally, I'd never thought I'd be the one to change.

Shyness overcame every inch of me in high school. I wasn't willing to step out of my comfort zone and show who I really was. At times my shyness was mistaken for disinterest. I asked one of my closest friends if she thinks I've changed and it took her a minute to respond. She said that since she's always known how I really am, she couldn't tell. Many of my closest friends can't tell that I have changed because they have always known who I really was. But I wasn't comfortable showing that to everyone. I would rather stay quiet, or not go somewhere because of the fear of getting put on the spot. I felt like I was always judged. I hated being put on the spotlight. I absolutely hated speaking in public. My face would turn bright pink for everything, then people would point out my bright pink face and that would make it worse. The nervousness would take over and I don't know why I'd turn pink. I hated having everyone stare at me. It gave me a weird feeling. I never thought I would be able to overcome my diffidence.

Then college came around two years ago. I was nervous going to a school with people I did not know whatsoever. At least with high school, I knew everyone. I didn't talk to them but I saw them around so it wasn't that bad. But for college, I was afraid of all that came with it. What if I didn't make friends? How am I going to get through college by myself? How am I going to learn all this on my own? Am I going to have to do a lot of presentations?

I chose Avila for many reasons. Many being because it is a small school and the class sizes are similar to an average high school class size. I thought that since the classes were small, that I'd fit right in perfectly. Though when the day came around, I felt mixed emotions. I wasn't sure if I was excited or afraid or both. That's when I remember telling myself in the car that I need to step out of my comfort zone. I need to get myself together. I needed to stop missing opportunities because I was shy. I need to go for it. How am I going to make friends or do something when I'm too afraid to take a chance? As cheesy as that sounds, that's what I told myself. If I want to do something, I have to convince myself that I can do it. Not only was I afraid of being myself, I was also afraid of failure. Failure in college. As many other people, I was intimidated of going for an opportunity because I was scared to fail and therefore I didn't go for the opportunity at all. My shyness also took part in that. This is why on my first day of college, I told myself I need to get out of my shell. Change was needed.

This didn't happen overnight obviously but I was surprised that it didn't take me a while to get used to it. Everyone was friendly and I liked that. I thought, "Maybe this wasn't so bad after all." On one of the first days of class, there was a blonde girl next to me and remembering the way I introduced myself makes both of us laugh. Of course I asked her for her name and gave her mine but one of the things we both recall was that I asked for her Instagram. Why? I have no idea. It's quite weird, but hey we're still great friends. Thanks for sticking around Savanna! I came into realization that I talked to someone for the first time. I never did that because of my anxiety and nervousness.

I look back at those times and it makes me laugh. I'm also proud of who I've become. I'm no longer shy or get nervous when talking to people. I'm very outgoing and open. I do things I didn't back then. I take every opportunity that comes my way. I have stepped out of my comfort zone, and I'm content with that decision. I'm myself regardless of what people say about. My mom has told me since day one that not everyone is going to like you. That there will always be that one person who has something negative to say. I used to care about that immensely. If you ask me if I care now, I will say no. My shyness/nervousness was an obstacle for me. It was also an excuse to being myself because I always cared about what people thought about me. I'm me no matter what. So if anyone wants to be my friend, hey!

I'm thankful for choosing Avila. Avila is a great school with the friendliest people ever. I will forever cherish the friends I have made because of Avila. I am nothing but grateful.