Now that 2016 is over and New Years resolutions have come and passed; I have decided that this year instead of just setting a few resolutions I wanted to actually change some stuff to make it a good year for me and possibly those around me.
Because, let's face it... 2016 had it's up and downs for a lot of people and some of the outcomes have been dragged into 2017. But with all the negativity floating around I have decided that it would be best to actually work hard to make this year great even if it doesn't really seem that possible.
A lot of what I want to work on has to be within myself. To make a good year happen – I need to work on myself and my pessimism about life.
With that, for too long I have allowed people to trample on me and take advantage of me. I thought if I had just said yes then I would be liked and I would be doing everyone a non-complicated favor. But now, I realize that I am 18 years old and I have no backbone. It has emotionally damaged me throughout the years and I am tired of being someones puppet. 2016 was just enough. In order to make this year a good year, I need to do stuff for me and not for everyone else. Of course, I am not going to stop being nice. I am just going to step back a few... giant... steps.
Now, I am just going to get down to the "cliché" resolution... I ended up working out a lot in 2016 and although I wasn't doing it to really lose weight. I was doing it to help my mind and body stay active and well during the year of negativity. I am going to keep doing that... My workouts, my meditations, my positive affirmations. It's all a process, but it's a process I am going to try and work hard to keep up. I need to.
I want to better myself by experiencing new things and getting out my shell and the boarders of my small town. I traveled over the summer and saw things that changed my way of thinking and I crave to keep doing that. It sadden me when I left and I allowed that sadness crush my dreams of hoping to keep traveling, because of money and school, but I believe it's important to get out there and find out what you like and don't like! That's exactly what I plan to do. This is the year I step out of my boarders.
Accepting who I am. I found when you learn to accept who you are, your appearance, your mental illnesses... Then you can have a happier life and a better year. I know it's hard and I am still learning how to do it, but when you get to that breathtaking awareness of self-acceptance it's going to be a great year.
Overall, I am going to smile more, laugh more, care more, be grateful for my life, accept more, cherish more. I am going to cry more and not be afraid of crying. I am not going to hold back my emotions to please other people. I am going to stop apologizing for being me. I am going to start loving myself and pick up new hobbies. I am going to experience this year with a good attitude and hope. That's all I need is hope.
