Hi.

It's been almost eight years now since I last spoke to you. It's been eight years since I last hugged you and told you that you were "the best man ever." I guess the world keeps spinning and it will until the day I die. But, it has been spinning for the last eight years without you by my side. I guess that is what hurts the most. The fact that you never got to see me graduate high school. You will never get to see me walk down the aisle or see me have my own children. That's what hurts the most. As much as I have gotten over the fact that you aren't here anymore, the pain is still there and will never go away.

As I am writing this to you, I hope you are reading it from heaven. The reason you are not here right now is because an ugly disease such as cancer came along and chose you as it's the latest victim. As much as I hate the disease that robbed you from living a long life, I have been able to come to terms with what happened. It took me a while but somehow I did it. I have been wondering lately what you have been up to? What has made you laugh after all these years that you have been gone? What are you thinking of what is happening down here? What do you think of how my life has unfolded for the past eight years?

I watched some videos from my childhood the other day and they made me smile because I got to hear your voice and laugh again. I missed hearing your laugh, the way it filled up an entire room. Those videos gave me some ease on how I was feeling lately. They helped me remember the amazing times we had when you were a part of my life and happy. They brought me back to my childhood days where I did not have a care in the world. They showed me what true childhood innocence is. I wanted to thank you for recording all of those moments from 2005 to 2009 before you passed away because they helped me grieve today in 2017. They help me laugh again after all the years of pain and sadness. They helped me recall all the good times I had as a child with you in my life. I might be sad now but it's okay because I still am happy with all the love nd happiness we shared over the years.

I just wanted to say hello and that I miss you. There have been times when I wanted to call you up on the phone to chat but I couldn't so I just spoke through the ceiling to you. I hope you heard me. I hope you have comforted me when I have been sad and have laughed along side me when I told a funny joke or made a fool of myself. I hope you are proud of me because a lot has changed in the last eight years since I last saw you. As much as I love the life I am living at the moment, I wish you were here so badly. But, since this is the life I was given I am living it the way I want to. I'll see you again soon, but not too soon.

XO,

Marty