We all would like to believe that we are honest people and that we value other honest people; yet the minute we get into a sticky situation where it would be easier to lie, we lie. Somewhere along the line, we have come to believe that dishonesty is the easy way out. We tell ourselves that we are saving someone's feelings. We tell ourselves that they will never forgive us if we tell them the truth. But the honest truth is that most of us would prefer the truth to most of the white lies we tell.
When did we decide that lying is easier? Because it really isn't. First of all, you have to come up with a lie that you think is both believable and better than the truth. And then you often have to tell more lies to cover up that one seemingly small lie. You probably already knew that would happen because your mom told you not to lie way back when you were in kindergarten; but somewhere along the line, we forgot that important life lesson.
One of our favorite justifications for lying is that it would hurt them if we told them the truth. But how often are we trying to protect ourselves and not them? Lying is ultimately selfish and it usually does more harm than good. Sure, sometimes we can't tell the whole truth, but most of the time we are held back from honesty by our own fear and selfishness. Relationships built on honesty are so important. How can you ever be trusted as a friend if all you do is lie? It doesn't matter if you have the best of intentions; dishonesty breaks down the trust in a relationship.
I will be the first to admit that I lie all the time when it's not needed because it seems more convenient in the moment. But I know that I need to remind myself that there is nothing more convenient about lying; it's just selfish. Yeah, sometimes the truth can hurt, but to twist the meaning of a "Lion King" quote, you can either run from it or learn from it. We spend so much of our times looking for the truth in our lives and in the world, yet there is absolutely no hope in finding that truth unless we can be honest. We need to be honest with ourselves and honest with those around us. Honestly, I am a flawed person and I make a lot of mistakes. And it is only when I can own up to my mistakes that I am able to learn from them and to grow.
Be honest because you love your friends and family and you don't want to live with relationships based on patterns of dishonesty. Be honest because you love yourself and you want to grow. Honesty can be scary and it can be hard, but it is better to grow from a world of difficulty than to live in a world of imaginary perfection.
