I feel like this should start like an AA meeting. “Hello, My name is Karma, and I’ve been in a relationship for four years.” I feel this way because there is some amount of shame that comes with being one half of a “teenage romance,” especially from my parents’ generation. To be honest with you, I don’t know why there is any shame in being committed to someone, but the older generation has embedded some ignominy in us about finding love “too young.”

There is an abundance of questions to be asked when relationships come up as dinner conversation. Any high school sweetheart knows exactly what I’m talking about, too. The most inappropriate things just suddenly become acceptable dinner talk with the relatives.

How long have you been together? Oh. Wow. This question isn’t so much the shocker as the response they give after you answer. Part of the reason people shame high school lovers stems from today’s divorce culture. Yeah, I’ve been dating my boyfriend longer than some adult marriages last. For some reason, people think that “us kids” can’t possibly know what we’re doing, like we only have limited brain function or something. I also believe jealousy plays a large part in it, based on the fact that most of the people judging my four-year relationship have ruined quite a few themselves. But, hey, we can’t help that you’ve been married up to the legal limit, and had two boyfriends since! You live your life, I’ll live mine.

Don’t you want to date around before you settle down? Have some fun? I can’t help but laugh every time I hear this question. No. I don’t want to date around and “have some fun.” I’m already having fun! It’s not like the fun goes away after the first couple of dates, no matter what anyone tells you. If you have it right, you can make the simplest things fun with your significant other. Sure, they get on your last nerve sometimes, but so do inconsiderate jerks that you go out with when you feel obligated to “date around,” and they won’t apologize and buy you flowers and take you to the fair.

You’re going to change in college, and you won’t like him/her anymore. Okay, first of all, you’re like my great aunt or something, so you don’t even really know who I am now. Secondly, I know I will change in college. But, I’ve changed since four years ago, and I’m still totally smitten by this guy. When you grow up together, you change together. It might be different for adults; I don’t know, because I’m not in a brand new adult relationship. All I know is how different 18-year-old me is from 14-year-old me, and how much more he loves me because of it. And 21-year-old him is definitely just as good as 17-year old him, if not better.

Don’t get me wrong; not every high school romance will work out. Not every prom king and queen is going to get married and have a storybook life. Sometimes, you do grow apart. But, sometimes, you don’t. My point is, you are the only one who has the right to decide who to love. Your mom can’t do it for you, no matter how hard she tries, and your great aunt has even less of a right at that.

I salute you for finding your own happiness. Every teenager who found the love of their life the first time, who will have such an epic romance to share with your grandchildren, please, feel no shame. There is no shame in loving someone unconditionally. No matter how stupid my extended family thinks I am, I know in my heart that I have made the right decision, and that is all that matters.