Scrolling through my Facebook feed, I came across this article. As a senior who is still in her relationship that started junior year of high school (actually our 5 year anniversary is on Friday), I can give you so many reasons why I'm glad I continued to pursue my relationship into college.
First off, I did not "take him to college." I did not pack him up in my suitcase and say, "you're coming with me!" We happened to end up at the same university. We both decided to keep our relationship going, despite all the new and exciting things college had to offer.
Whatever it brought us, we would experience it together.
Here are some things I would have missed out on if I decided to end my relationship just because I started college:
1. Growing with someone as we moved on from high school.
You're completely right, college is a new beginning. I am not the same person I was in high school, and neither is my boyfriend. Not once has either of us ever brought up high school baggage to tear the other down. Not to mention, if you get serious with anyone in college, there's much more embarrassing things you'll do in your college years that anyone can hold against you. If you're worried about insecurities or guilt-tripping into keeping a relationship, you're right, he's not the one. But it's unfair to both you and whoever you're leaving in the dust if you just assume these things will happen. If your relationship is strong, it can withstand the temptations and worries a new place, thousands of new faces, and new experiences will bring you. Even better, you can tackle them together.
2. He pushes me forward.
My boyfriend inspires me every day. He inspires me to be my best self and follow my dreams. He was there for me, supporting me when I changed my major more than 3 times. He supported me when I wanted to transfer away from him and the university we both knew. Watching him grow and follow his dreams and become his best self has been amazing, and I can't wait to see how we both grow even more when we graduate in May and enter the real world. Having a boyfriend or girlfriend doesn't mean that he or she is your only friend. It doesn't mean that you can't pursue your own goals or grow individually as well as together. It doesn't mean you can't go out with your friends and have a good time.
3. We get to experience college both individually and together.
We are in different majors. We're in different organizations. We volunteer at different places. We live in different apartment complexes. We have different jobs. Our schedules are completely different. He has his friends and I have mine, and luckily some are mutual. We're both living our best lives. When I transferred away for a semester, he didn't even try to stop me. He let me go, and it allowed me to grow. We were apart for a semester and it only built our trust in each other and what we have as we grew individually in different places. College is crazy, and at the end of the day, I have someone to share everything with. And at the end of our college experience, I'll have someone to share memories from high school and college with as we dive into the next chapter.
Now that I've addressed some of your main concerns with taking your significant other to college with you, let me continue as to why it's the best thing in the entire world:
4. You always have someone on your side.
College is hard. It's fun, but it. is. hard. You're poor, you're not going to ace every test, your friends will piss you off, etc. It's nice to always be able to text your boyfriend and rant to them. Or just have them hold you after a long day or a week where everything seems to be going wrong. You have a best friend and a partner in crime throughout everything.
5. Dating sucks.
I haven't dated since high school, and man am I so glad I never have to go back. Throughout four years of college I've had friends all sorts of hurt and bent out of shape from what today's dating culture is like. It sounds horrible. No, thanks.
6. You get to focus on yourself because you aren't constantly trying to impress people.
You literally never have to care about what others think of you because you have someone who will love you unconditionally. That love and support for you to be your true self helps you grow in so many ways.
7. When you're sick, you have someone to take care of you.
This is probably the best perk of having a boyfriend that goes to the same college as you. They've seen you glow-up from high school to college and know you inside and out, so a little stomach bug isn't going to phase them.
8. A date for every occasion!
Study dates, coffee dates, formal dates... I never have to stress out about who I'm going to ask and what it ~means~ if I ask someone out. I have the best date for any occasion, and I know we're going to have a good time. We get to have fun and make memories rather than wake up in the morning with regrets. I have someone I can go out with on Saturday night and a date for church and brunch on Sunday morning.
9. So many memories.
I have a picture of us from our high school graduation day on my desk. If we had ended our relationship back then I wouldn't have 4 years worth of memories to look back on together.
10. Our future.
If we had broken up just because we were going to college, I wouldn't have 5 years worth of building a relationship so strong I know it can withstand anything. I don't know where my life would have taken me, but it would have been much emptier without him there. I look at what high school and college has given us and I love thinking about what the future will bring. College is only four years. Love lasts a lifetime.
Of course, I realize that I'm extremely lucky in my relationship and lots of high school relationships weren't meant to last forever, and that's okay. If your relationship is toxic, brings you down, or doesn't bring you happiness and love, you shouldn't waste your time. BUT, don't end something good just because of college, or what lies unknown in the future. Love is worth the pursuit.