Stop lying to yourself, he’s probably not the one. At least not right now.

See, the thing about being young is that everyone, and I mean everyone is selfish. There’s nothing wrong with that, especially at our age. I mean, we’re all in college; we have to focus on ourselves, and put ourselves first.

And then in walks some dude who probably hasn’t taken a shower in two days and calls everyone he meets some variation of the word “brother.” You know you shouldn’t get involved with him, or even bother talking to him, but you do because, well, he’s six foot two and his eyes are so blue.

It’s a classic catch twenty two because now he’s paying attention to you, and he’s living for the attention you’re giving him. I mean, what could possibly go wrong? And that’s where the fatal mistake is made. Because, if we’re being honest with ourselves, most college guys (and girls) couldn’t care less about building meaningful relationships, or anything close to one. I mean, who has the time for that, right?

Here’s the fun part though; they’ll tell you what you want to hear until you give them what they want. Then, suddenly, you’re blocked off their Snapchat for being “too much right now.” And it’s this kind of emotional manipulation that us girls have a problem with. Because, no matter how “straight up” he tells you he is, he’s probably being just as “straight up” with Becky from Communications.

So, here’s my advice: drop him. I mean, you don’t have to be rude or malicious about it. Not that many men often take women’s feelings into consideration, but that’s beside the point. And listen, I know that not all guys are bad. But hear me out on this, you don’t need anyone right now. All you need is you. Trust me on this, you will be happier with yourself in the end knowing you don’t need to rely on anyone else to feel secure and confident in yourself. And you’ll be even happier knowing that some guy named Brad isn’t going around his frat house bragging that his body count went up because of you.

Today, it seems that “hookup culture” is running rampant, especially in college settings. And again, there’s nothing wrong with that; but speaking from experience and knowing what my friend’s have been through, sometimes it’s better to not get involved with anyone without knowing them for a while. You have to know your worth, and you have to make them prove to you that they see it too. I know a lot of people don’t agree with this kind of mindset, they think it’s sexist, that it only blames men for the misfortune of girls. But that’s just the thing, I’m not blaming men for being the way that they are, I’ve simply educated myself on the reality of life in college; and now I’m relaying my studies to my peers… I mean, that’s what college is all about, isn’t it?