Fairy tales and Disney movies taught us that someday Prince Charming will come along and sweep us off our feet. If real life was like these stories, we would fall hard and fast, dropping everything else just to be with this wonderful man. But what happens when you still haven’t met Mr. Right and he doesn’t seem to be coming around any time soon?
You live.
You stop waiting for someone else to “complete” your life because you yourself have so much potential. There’s literally a world of adventure and possibility out there for the taking, so why hold yourself back because of the possibility that you may not find “the one” along the way? Relationships can be amazing times to have fun, explore yourself and connect with another person in a way you will never experience with any other individual. But they don’t give you meaning and by no means do they define your life. I’m not saying that you should entirely give up on the prospect of finding a life-partner, but I’m saying that should not be your focus. A helping hand or a shoulder to cry on are very much appreciated, but you’re no damsel in distress and you don’t need saving.
I know so many girls who’ve felt lost and useless at times because a boy didn’t like them back or a boy had broken up with them. This in turn broke my heart every time because I know them to be amazing people who happen to be strong and independent women. To me, they were never defined by the men who had crossed through. I know them by who they are as people, the way they make me feel and how they live their lives.
In my limited experience as a 20-year-old woman I’ve learned that the only person I can truly always depend on is myself—there’s no Prince Charming in sight.
I love my family and friends dearly, but there are ways in which I know I’m on my own, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. I have aspirations: I want to travel, I want to go to graduate or maybe even medical school, I want to spend time with my family and friends, and I want to have time to just be me. I’ve dreamed about my wedding since I was a little girl, but I know that this isn’t my only focus and that maybe one day everything will fall into place. Any potential future husband of mine is someone who’ll understand this and will hopefully be living his life in a similar manner.
One day you will meet someone who will make you giddy and never want to let go, and that will truly be a happy day. He’ll support you and you will support him equally, and you’ll build a beautiful future together. However, it won’t be the make-or-break defining feature of your life. This will be the icing on the cake, and the cherry on top of the amazing life you’ve already built for yourself. It’ll be the next great adventure, because as the great Christina Yang once told Meredith Grey, “He’s very dreamy, but he’s not the sun. You are.”
