I sit here at a small coffee shop, a city away from my own, and I write to you with genuine words, this article is dedicated to anyone with a broken past and mended spirits.
When I was eight years old, I began to associate "love" with "discipline". Needless to say, I grew up a very conservative child. I was raised in an Asian household, with rigid expectations of the person I was already supposed to be. I never met the level of excellence that my parents demanded which left me with a pang of inadequacy somewhere in the pit of my stomach. I am not going to write to you about my horrors as a child or the heartache throughout my adolescence, not because it doesn't matter- but because it has served its part in my life- it has molded me into the person that I am today. Someone who is not only capable of seeing shades of gray, but also brown.
In my transformation of becoming the person that I am today I have learned to become self aware, because more often then not people usually do what was done to them. Realizing this intensely changed my perspective on people. It made me realize that people are not inherently evil- with this in mind, I also realize that this does not serve as an excuse for the evil that they have presumed. Becoming self aware made it easier to forgive, and pushed me to not only break a vicious cycle but a barrier that I have subconsciously created within myself.
I am a writer who only writes about two things: what I know and what I wish to become. What I am, and what I wish I was. When I was younger I used to fall asleep wishing that I could somehow become better- but now that i am older I realize that even mountains move with time- and just because I felt that way growing up does not mean that I have to feel that way grown up.
In the process of growing up, you will get your heart broken again and again. Whether that be from your sweet heart, best friend, or father. You will ache with regret from all the moments you missed out on- and obsess about the ones you took for granted. You will encounter all kinds of people with different stories and intentions. You will meet villains and heroines and you will watch as they leave- you will meet critics who will tell you time and time again that it's not enough, that you are not enough. But remember that you hold the pen. Your own story is constantly changing and being rewritten with every decision you make. Be brave enough to stop rereading old chapters and fixating on old plots. Surround yourself with people and things that have the ability to break your block. Aspire to inspire, you are more than one chapter. Do not dangle your past in front of you, it will always haunt you if you let it. Be wise enough to learn from it, and be sure to prepare yourself for every plot twist that comes your way.
