I've recently spent a lot of time wondering if I am having the true "college experience." I wonder if I should go home less weekends, or if I should be branching out more. I wonder if I should have done something completely crazy and out of character by now. I wonder if I should have changed my major twice already.

It seems that the so called "college experience" has many definitions. To many--it seems elusive and ever so exciting. As a high school senior, I hoped and dreamed about college--about having all the freedom in the world to do whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted to. I dreamed of having what I thought could be a completely different life as a college student and how it would change everything.

Of course college does change a lot, but a lot has stayed the same too.

I still talk to my mom everyday, and she still knows about pretty much everything I'm doing. I spend a heck of a lot more time studying than I do on anything else, and fun adventures are usually on special occasions. I spend even more time rewatching shows on Netflix than I did in high school, which is really saying something. I eat dining hall food.

It's not crazy or exciting, but my life is changing.

The funny thing about this year is that it has changed my life in ways I never expected. I came in thinking I had figured everything out, and it didn't take much time for me to realize that I didn't.

What I do know though, is that the college experience is defined differently for everyone. Some of us are the most social we will ever be in our lives, while some spend more time watching Netflix than actually interacting with other people. Some have perfect Instagram aesthetics of all of their amazing pictures, or just a lot of really good food.

And me?

College for me has become a second home.

I may see my parents every single weekend, and I may still talk to my mom everyday, but I am finding different ways to branch out--in joining clubs, in learning about career paths, in taking classes I thought I never would.

College has taught me the value of friends that see the good in you when you cannot see it yourself.

I have never found myself quite so confident in who I have chosen to surround myself with. I have never felt so much love from a group of people, and I am reminded of it everyday--in the simple moments when we all meet up for lunch, or at night when we snack (probably more than we should), and all just crack up laughing over nothing.

College, for me, is realizing that I can do what I want with my life, even if it's not what I expected.

I am learning everyday that perhaps the universe had a plan for me after all, because all of this--UW, the classes I take each day, the things I want to do with my life--is lining up in ways I never thought possible.

And college for me is realizing that everything doesn't have to be perfect either.

I don't have everything figured out--in fact, I'm far from it, but I'm loving every confusing, crazy, joyful moment.