Single young women are a growing and increasingly important demographic. With changes in economy, access to education, cultural climate, and changes in family structure, more young women are choosing to remain single and childless. And yet, even with the increased numbers of young single women (or, YSW), there are still a few stubborn myths about them.

1. That we hate men.

Probably the most common myth is that women who stay single are crazy man-haters who reject men because they're trying to make a point about feminism. It's true that thanks to many decades of feminist groundbreaking, it is now possible for women to become self-reliant, turning their education and work opportunities into independence. However, I have yet to meet a YSW who chooses singleness out of sheer spite -- we're just not super-into romantic relationships.

2. That we're closeted lesbians.

This is another fairly common conclusion to jump to. Once or twice a year, when my extended family is all together, the questions inevitably arise: "So, Sara, do you have a boyfriend yet? Are you interested in anyone? When are you going to start dating?" When the answers to those questions are "no" and "never," an awkward silence usually ensues, followed by a nervous, half-whispered, "Do you...like women?" Now, while many women choose not to date men do so because they are, in fact, interested in women, for the majority of YSW, singleness is not a matter of orientation, but a choice based on what is best and most comfortable for the individual.

3. That we're damaged.

People who know YSW often suspect some traumatic event in the woman's life that has led her to swear off men, and while it's true that traumatic experiences can strongly influence a woman's relationship with men, for the most part, being single is a normal, healthy decision -- something not made out of fear, loathing, or insecurity.

4. That we're playing hard to get.

Believe it or not, women usually do say what they mean. Unfortunately, they're not often taken at their word. Fellow YSW have shared their experiences of openly stating their intentions to remain single only for men to take it as a challenge -- the assumption of course being that these women are simply coy and the apparent lack of interest is really just a hurdle. A YSW should be taken at her word. Singleness is a personal choice, not a challenge.

5. That we're Ice Queens.

It would be nice if we could say our lack of romantic interest is because we feel nothing at all, but let's face it, humans are social creatures hardwired to seek out companionship. That doesn't go away when someone chooses to be single, but for many, the demands of a relationship and the benefits of single life make that momentary loneliness less significant. A person uninterested in romantic attachment can be very warm and emotionally open, even though one door is closed.

6. That we're selfish.

Despite the progress YSW have made in the way they are perceived, there is a persistent negative stereotype applied to single people, and women especially. Many will think we're selfish -- unwilling to give up our time, resources, and emotional energy for someone else. The fact that YSW are often all-too-happy to remain childless does nothing to soften this perception. But the truth is that women who are single by choice are no more selfish than anyone. The choice to either seek companionship or remain single is one that always comes down to the individual's best interests.

So this is just a friendly reminder that a person's personal decisions are not up for debate. Singleness is not a challenge, a tragedy, or a sign of personal defect. It's not an indication of a person's orientation, and it's not a decision made to prove a point. To my fellow YSW, keep being the independent, beautiful rule-breakers you are.