The Harm In Playing Hard To Get

The Harm In Playing Hard To Get

In reality, this is a cover up so that you wont get hurt and you know it.

The Harm In Playing Hard To Get

When a woman has her guard up, consider it the Great Wall of China. Physically, the battle of the sexes is over, and men have won—they will always be stronger physically. However, mental strength is an entirely different element of power that humans possess, and women have proven to dominate.

As a woman, I have recognized that I am a peculiar being—indecisive, indirect, and independent. These can be good and bad attributes depending on how they are used.

I noticed a lot during college. Now that I am at the end of my collegiate time, I've seen my share of different women and how they present themselves to men. I came to the conclusion that there are two main types of women:

The play hard to getters and the hopeful romantics.

(Again please note that I did say the word MAIN. Obviously, there can be more, however, this opinion comes from my own observations.)

I fell into the category of the play hard to get. However, many of my friends were the hopeless romantics. I would watch as they would throw themselves into relationship after relationship. Heartbreaks became a norm, but they didn't care. They wanted it.

They wanted someone to love.

And they were willing to get hurt over and over to have it.

I used to view them as weak and foolish. I used to claim that I was going to be single forever because I was above acting crazy. No one was good enough for me, and relationships were pointless.

I used to think I had nothing in common with this type of woman, after all, I was confident happy and satisfied with not having a man.


I had way more in common with these girls than I realized.

We both got ready in full makeup, clothes, and hair. Even if it was just to the movies with our friends, or to go eat dinner in the cafeteria. All of us were dressing up for the same reason—attention.

Both groups of women get the same feeling in their stomach when a guy they desire gives them the time of day, and attention they are looking for.

I wanted the same thing as these hopelessly romantic women, they just outwardly expressed it, while I was an arrogant coward. I was so afraid of getting hurt, so I shut the possibility out for a really long time. I ended things with anyone I could have potentially gotten close with because I couldn't take a chance—unlike my courageous friends.

Now that I am happy and in a relationship—I realize how brave the hopeless romantic women are. If I would never have changed my ways, I wouldn't be where I am today.

In love.

To the hopeless romantics—never stop searching. Don't be reckless, you have to be smart. You are the bravest type of woman there is. Keep putting yourself out there to find love, and don't give up.

To the woman who is playing hard to get—I understand where you are coming from. Keep being picky, however, don't make it impossible. When someone spectacular comes your way, don't let them get away.

Mental toughness can go both ways as a woman. When we put our guard up, it's strong enough to not let anyone—which can result in never letting anyone get close to us. However, mental toughness is also being brave. And letting people in, while also being smart about it.

Take a chance.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

119 People Reveal How The Pandemic Has Affected Their Love Lives, And Honestly... Relatable

"I haven't been able to get out of the 'talking phase' with anyone."

The reality is, there's no part of life the pandemic hasn't affected. Whether it's your work life, your home life, your social life, or your love life, coronavirus (COVID-19) is wreaking havoc on just about everything — not to mention people's health.

When it comes to romance, in particular, people are all handling things differently and there's no "right way" of making it through, regardless of your relationship status (single, taken, married, divorced, you name it). So, some of Swoon's creators sought out to hear from various individuals on how exactly their love lives have been affected since quarantine began.

Keep Reading... Show less

- Though as a little girl, I had the silkiest, softest hair that would get compliments everywhere I went, since I turned about thirteen I've since had coarse, dry hair no amount of deep conditioning masks or sulfate-free shampoo could fix.

- I started using the Raincry's Condition Boar Bristle Brush several months ago, and while I noticed that my hair had been softer, silkier, and shinier than it had ever been, I didn't make the connection because I never thought a simple hairbrush could make any difference in my hair texture.

- I will be the first to admit that I thought it was ridiculous to spend nearly a hundred dollars on a hairbrush, but this one eliminates the need for me to use any heat tools or styling products on it.

- I put some oil or a serum in my hair when it's wet, brush my hair with the boar bristle brush once it's dry, and end up with the lowest maintenance, shiniest hair I've had since I was 8 years old.


Keep Reading... Show less

Bingeing a romantic comedy is always a good idea, and during this pandemic, these movies bring us one of the only elements of romance we can get. Through all the break-ups, obstacles, and struggles in our love lives, romantic comedies have always been there to make us laugh and keep us company while we cry.

While we love these movies for the beyond gorgeous male love interests, the female protagonists are still the ones we always remember. Although rom-coms are far from reality, it is always fun to imagine what our life would be like if a cinematic studio was behind our love life. So what does your favorite romantic comedies say about your dream guy?

Keep Reading... Show less

Whether you're in an unhealthy relationship currently, you know someone who is, or you just want to have these numbers saved just in case it could one day save someone's life (if not your own), this article is for you. Here are three numbers to save in your contacts ASAP so you can always be safe, both physically and mentally, in every relationship.

Keep Reading... Show less

As any poor college student, a little kick of caffeine for less than a dollar has always sounded great to me. So, naturally, AriZona Iced Tea has been a go-to for as long as I can remember.

Keep Reading... Show less

The NBA is back, and for basketball fans, like myself, it has been the BEST news we have heard since COVID-19 shutdown play indefinitely. I mean, come on, we need to see if James Harden can once again perform so well he has back-to-back 50 point games, Kawhi can lead another team to the championship title, and whether Giannis is going to be back-to-back MVP... among like 500 other things running through our heads!

In the midst of all of the amazing statistics and records that these players are breaking, though, we also just love the NBA because well, there are some pretty good looking guys out there. Here are the 19 hottest NBA players (in no particular order) you would totally let slam dunk on you now that the NBA has returned.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

Everything You Need To Know About Macronutrients, Because A Diet Should Be More Than Calories

Pay attention to what you're eating, not just how much you're eating.

Plenty of people are familiar with the "calories in, calories out" (CICO) method of dieting which can be used for losing, gaining, or maintaining weight. This method relies on calculating a person's total daily energy expenditure (TDEE) to ensure that they are not overeating or undereating to achieve their desired weight. TDEE considers a person's height, weight, age, gender, and level of activity to determine what their caloric intake should be — some calculators can factor in body fat percentage as well. When I used a TDEE calculator online, it said that my TDEE would be 1,990 calories if I was trying to maintain my weight, but are all calories created equal? I'd argue that they're not.

It might seem obvious to some of you that 1,990 calories of macaroni and cheese are not healthy at all compared to 1,990 calories of varied foods (fruit, veggies, meat, bread, etc.).

Keep Reading... Show less

Just Because You're Asked To Be In A Wedding, Doesn't Always Mean You Should Say Yes

If you can't invest time, money, and YOURSELF, maybe say no to the offer for the bride's sake!

Being in a wedding is a really big commitment. I personally think if you've never been in one before, you don't understand the time, money, and energy that goes into being a part of it.

Keep Reading... Show less
Politics and Activism

Dear Closeted Latina,

You were never alone.

Remember how the Latin world got rocked when Ricky Martin came out?

Keep Reading... Show less

If you're anything like me, you're probably anxious about going back to college. The uncertainty of nearly everything is stressful and makes it difficult to prepare for going back to campus. Take it one step at a time and remain calm! If nothing else, take a look at this list of six essentials for living on campus during the COVID-19 pandemic! You got this!

Keep Reading... Show less

First, let's talk about some reasons people cheat in relationships in the first place:

1. They have low self-esteem.

Are you feeling like you are not good enough? Do you feel like you are not attractive enough? Feeling as if you are not worth the love can lead to self-sabotage.

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments