I do not have first hand experience growing up without a father. Luckily, I have grown up with the most amazing father a girl could ask for. My father was not so lucky.
My dad’s dad passed away when he was only 15 -- the year of your temporary license, the year you can finally start driving (with a parent in the car of course). It is also the year you start taking advanced placement classes. The year you attend your first football game that you aren’t in the way back of the crowd for. The year you begin to look at colleges. The year you start thinking about your future.
For my dad, 15 was the year he lost his father. His dad went to wait for the bus to go to work one day. A day just like any other day. He had a heart attack. Just like that, my 15-year-old father was fatherless.
He didn’t have a dad to drive around with his temporary license anymore. He didn’t have a dad to help him with his homework anymore. He didn’t have a dad to share his high school experience with anymore. He didn’t have a dad to talk to about colleges, or his future anymore. And, most of all, he was now the man of the house. It was down to just him and his mother.
Dads are there to pack your lunches. To hug you when you cry. To take you to professional baseball games, and cheer for you at your baseball games. To attend your concerts, and soccer games, and art shows. To drive you around before you can drive yourself. To worry about you when you come home after curfew. To prepare you for your future, and support you every step of the way. To most importantly be your best friend.
Could you imagine not having someone in your life like this? Could you imagine getting your childhood robbed from you because suddenly, there’s no one to pack your lunch, or drive you around, or support you? You suddenly have to fend for yourself.
You have to take care of your mom. Your mom who has just been hit by a wall of sadness. Your mom who has just developed breast cancer because of the stress. Your mom who in the future will develop emphysema because she smoked before they knew better. Your mom who was robbed of her soul mate way too soon.
You have to get a job. You’re 15, where the hell are you going to work? You have to find someplace to make money, so you can support your family. You have to get a job so that you can buy yourself a car. You have to get a job so that you can put yourself through college. You have to get a job so that you can support yourself when needed.
It’s your prime years. The years where you create life long friendships. The years where you create memories that you’ll remember forever. These are your prime years, and you have to take care of your mom, and basically make a living for your family.
You’re 15 years old living the life of an adult because one awful day, your father disappeared from this earth. You wonder all of the time, what you did to deserve this. You spent your childhood wanting to grow up and be like the big kids, and now that your childhood was cut short, you’d give anything to go back. You’d give anything to see your dad one more time. To hear his voice one more time. To hug him one more time. And I bet this time you wouldn’t let go.
