Loud, proud, and always crazy, that’s what it was like growing up in my family. I have a huge family, to give you a picture, I have 18 first cousins on my mother’s side alone. Do not even get me started about my father’s side. I have first cousins, second cousins, third cousins, and even fourth cousins, aunts, uncles, great aunts and uncles, and at one point had all my grandparents around. When I was a kid there were always people at my house, relatives and non-relatives, but then again when you’re Arab you always find out that the other Arabs you know are somehow related to you.
Every Sunday we would go to my grandmother’s house on my mother’s side for dinner but not a typical quiet Sunday evening dinner, there were so many of us that we just grabbed plates and sat wherever there was room on the sofas. There were always gatherings from someone’s birthday, anniversary, graduation and so on. When holidays came around there was always enough food for an army. I do not think my family knows the meaning of the word small; everything was always made in large quantities. Whenever you went over to someone’s house the first thing you were asked was “Did you eat?” or “You want to eat?” Even if you have eaten already, you were basically forced to eat more. Or if you said no thank you to be nice, that did not matter, you were still eating what they made. Food is very important in the Arab household and it is more respectful if you ate what was offered. If you did not eat what an aunt of yours made, you were hurting her feelings and making it seem as if she does not cook well enough, even though this is not true and you were probably just not hungry.
Having friends over was always interesting. I used to have to explain everything to my American friends before they met my family. “Don’t be surprised about this…” I would say or “This may be weird but it is totally normal for us." It was funny to see their reactions when my family did things they were not used to. They would leave saying, “Your family is really funny” or “My family is nothing like that, we are so boring." There was never time that my friends did not feel welcome around my family.
When other Arab guests came over to your house it was your family’s time to shine. Your nicest room in the house was always used for guests. You could show off your furniture and brag about how amazing your children are. It is mandatory to serve as much food as possible to guests, they never come to an empty table, it is usual to serve tea or coffee, cookies, nuts, fruit, and whatever else is in your pantry and just make them feel the most welcomed. This way they leave your house happy and tell everyone else in the community how great of a host you are.
When it came time for Arab weddings it was always a fun time. There was always great food, great music, nonstop dancing, and money being thrown. Yes, we throw money at weddings. It is just a tradition and the money goes to the bride and groom. You are always told that hopefully you are next to get married or hopefully your family can be the next ones to prepare your wedding. Since you know, getting married is very important in the Arab culture, it means starting a family and adding even more children to your already huge family. It is supposed to be as a happy wish for you but even when I was in middle school, other people told my parents this. Meanwhile I was there thinking about everything else besides boys.
Growing up Arab was an interesting experience to say the least, but when I look back at it, I am glad I grew up this way. There was never a dull moment and it was always a fun time when my family was together. It makes me laugh every time I recollect memories of growing up. I would never think of changing my culture for even a second. I love everything about being Arab!
