For the longest time, I was a believer in the age old saying that “the grass is always greener on the other side.” While I think I’ve always known that this wasn’t exactly true, my subconscious adherence to this idea led to a false mindset that change was the end all be all to happiness. Because of this, I developed a tendency to want to run from problems rather than work through them and abandon ship when the waters got rough. Although the illusion of greener grass ahead kept me moving, it also led me into many challenging situations that eventually taught me the truth about grass: it isn’t always greener on the other side.
This theme that has defined many areas of my own life thus far has also been a defining plot point of many great stories across time. One of those stories - one of my favorites - is Great Expectations by Charles Dickens. In this novel, the protagonist, Pip, comes to the realization that wealth and status are not as important as they seem to be. He comes to this realization, of course, after several plot twists and revelations concerning his wealth and the benefactor that made it possible. In the story, Pip realizes that his ‘great expectations’ of what it is like to be well-off are really not so great after all. The striking thing about the novel is that it takes Pip quite a while to come to these realizations. Although there is a somewhat happy, though decidedly vague, ending to the story, it takes a significant amount of trials and difficulties to get to that ending.
One of the main themes of Great Expectations is to not to take for granted what you already have. Pip takes a very long time to come to this conclusion, and I personally don’t want to learn that lesson after going through buckets of heartache. Though it definitely took some unhappy moments to realize this truth in my own life, I feel like I finally understand why the saying “the grass is always greener on the other side” is a myth. Coming to this conclusion can often be difficult because it seems that in general we are always taught to look towards the future, and the next best thing. While the future will no doubt be great, we all need to learn to live in the moment.
The funny thing about grass is that if you water it, it becomes greener. If you aren’t happy with your present circumstances, you, and only you, can change them. And I don’t mean running away from problems or turning everything upside down to shake up your boring life. Change doesn't have to be drastic to make a difference. For me, watering the grass I already had meant stepping - or leaping in some cases - outside of my comfort zone. For Pip, that meant helping others, rather than focusing on himself, and returning to his roots.
As a pretty introverted high schooler, and now college student, I have had to do things that make me nervous. This may have meant getting a new job, taking a leadership role on campus, or something as small as talking to the person next to me before class rather than browsing through Facebook on my phone. While these things definitely gave me anxiety - some more than others - they also helped me build my own community right where I am. Now that community has blossomed into something amazing - and something I am proud to be a part of.
Making your grass greener takes time, but it also takes that first step. So what are you waiting for?
P.S. If you’d like to read Great Expectations, which I highly recommend, there’s a free eBook version available via Project Gutenberg here.