Grammy, I Wish You Were Here For The Adult Years

Grammy, I Wish You Were Here For The Adult Years

Every day, I wish you were still here.

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Every day, I wish I could tell you so much. I wish I could tell you how much I miss you, how heartbroken our family is, especially my mom. I'm sure you're not surprised by any of this, but I wish I could tell you. I wish I could tell you everything that's happened since you've passed away.

Where to begin? Well after a terrible junior year, my senior year of high school was a blast. I drove to school every day and got a good part in the play. I went to Disney World on the Senior trip, then went to Europe with my sister on that Theater trip you didn't want us to go on. It was a once in a lifetime experience though and we were totally safe.

I choose the only college I wanted to go to, Towson University. I'm currently in my second year and am studying film. I'm in a film society and a sorority, and through these groups, I've made lifelong friends. My first year of college was a success. I met some wonderful people and really blossomed into an independent young woman.

I've had two boyfriends since you passed. The first one was very kind and treated me well. We went to senior prom together and broke up eventually because he was a sophomore and I was headed to college. The second one I'm currently dating. He is exactly my type: cute, into movies and perfectly nerdy. He is beyond sweet and treats me like a princess. I'm very happy with him. I wish you could meet him, I think you would like him.

There are so many people I've met, experiences I've had that I wish I could tell you all about. I often wonder how you'd feel about them. I wonder how you'd feel about the shape of the world today. I think you would try to find some good amidst all the bad. I know that you would never lose hope.

Every day I wish you were here. Every day I wish I could tell you everything I'm feeling, you always knew exactly what to say. Every day I miss your wit, you warmth, and your magnetic personality. Every day I miss you. Every day I wish I could tell you how much I love you.

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The Truth About Young Marriage

Different doesn't mean wrong.
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When I was a kid, I had an exact picture in my mind of what my life was going to look like. I was definitely not the kind of girl who would get married young, before the age of 25, at least.

And let me tell you, I was just as judgmental as that sentence sounds.

I could not wrap my head around people making life-long commitments before they even had an established life. It’s not my fault that I thought this way, because the majority opinion about young marriage in today’s society is not a supportive one. Over the years, it has become the norm to put off marriage until you have an education and an established career. Basically, this means you put off marriage until you learn how to be an adult, instead of using marriage as a foundation to launch into adulthood.

When young couples get married, people will assume that you are having a baby, and they will say that you’re throwing your life away — it’s inevitable.

It’s safe to say that my perspective changed once I signed my marriage certificate at the age of 18. Although marriage is not always easy and getting married at such a young age definitely sets you up for some extra challenges, there is something to be said about entering into marriage and adulthood at the same time.

SEE ALSO: Finding A Husband In College

Getting married young does not mean giving up your dreams. It means having someone dream your dreams with you. When you get lost along the way, and your dreams and goals seem out of reach, it’s having someone there to point you in the right direction and show you the way back. Despite what people are going to tell you, it definitely doesn’t mean that you are going to miss out on all the experiences life has to offer. It simply means that you get to share all of these great adventures with the person you love most in the world.

And trust me, there is nothing better than that. It doesn’t mean that you are already grown up, it means that you have someone to grow with.

You have someone to stick with you through anything from college classes and changing bodies to negative bank account balances.

You have someone to sit on your used furniture with and talk about what you want to do and who you want to be someday.

Then, when someday comes, you get to look back on all of that and realize what a blessing it is to watch someone grow. Even after just one year of marriage, I look back and I am incredibly proud of my husband. I’m proud of the person he has become, and I’m proud of what we have accomplished together. I can’t wait to see what the rest of our lives have in store for us.

“You can drive at 16, go to war at 18, drink at 21, and retire at 65. So who can say what age you have to be to find your one true love?" — One Tree Hill
Cover Image Credit: Sara Donnelli Photography

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To The Girls With Younger Sisters, Tell Them This Now

Put your makeup on, do your hair, get your nails done, and most importantly, show them that you don't have a care in the world.

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Recently it's been put on my heart to share my two cents about bullying.

I have a beautiful, talented, funny, smart, and all around amazing little sister who has recently not been given a fair hand when it comes to friendships. Thankfully, she has never been truly and really "bullied" however, girls have been mean and nasty to her in the past.

When I was a senior in high school, my younger sister was a freshman. Being an upperclassman at the time was an advantage because anyone who was mean to her, I took care of. Not in a bullying type of way, but in a way to where the antagonist would understand to leave my sister alone, or apologize. All other older siblings, both girls, and guys can agree with me on this... my instinct just comes out and I want no harm to come to my mini-me.

I have come to realize over the years that a lot of mean-girl bullying crap stems from jealousy or insecurity.

I used to be very shy and timid, which if you know me personally probably seems ridiculous, but it's true. I would let people walk all over me. Eventually, I grew a tough skin and began handling my issues. NOBODY was going to mess with me, but even more importantly, my family, friends, or dog.

I learned that confrontation works from time to time... they get really caught off guard when you call them out on their bs to their face (rather than over the phone.) If that fails, which it might then there's this motto;

Put your makeup on, do your hair, get your nails done.

I mean seriously. You do a little self-care, make yourself feel strong and even more beautiful than you are, than you're already winning the fight. If you act like their mean-girl games don't hurt you, then eventually they won't. If you have to cry, wait until you're home or harness that sadness to stand up for yourself.

I was told all of these things as I got older and learned to have somewhat of a backbone, but I really wish I would've learned it earlier.

This motto can carry you through most things in life. Bullying, breakups, job interviews, whatever it may be. I have told my sister always to let it seem like she doesn't care, and I will never stop reiterating it to her. I want her to actually use this motto and run with it. I think all younger girls need to hear this.

It's not a nice world out there most of the time. Learn to stand strong and confident in yourself, be sure to share that with the baby sistas.

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