As an only child, for my whole life, I was extremely dependent on my parents. I’ve always been a homebody; I rarely had to do anything on my own or speak for myself. When it became time to register for college I wanted nothing to do with “away” schools. I was so happy where I was in life--I don’t handle change well. So with that, I didn’t plan on changing a thing.
My mom always told me that she wanted to go away for college but her parents wouldn’t allow that. She tried everything to persuade me to at least apply to away schools. But I could never picture myself being away from my family, and I was also in a long serious relationship at the time. I couldn’t picture my life without my boyfriend so I had zero plan of having a life without him. He didn’t want me to go away either; it was mutual and we decided the farthest I’d go was a 30-minute commute each day so I could be with my parents and him at any time.
My mom forced me to apply to Purchase as well as the schools close to my hometown. I will never forget our first visit to Purchase because I was so angry, I quote on quote said “Wow, this would be a long drive every day…” and my mom looked at me and laughed, “You’d live on campus Kara.” “No thanks,” I said. We got to campus and frankly, I’m shocked that my eyes aren’t permanently stuck in the back of my head because the entire time we were there I was rolling them. Cheese club? Okay. Stood? Cool. Lots of trees? Nice. Starbucks? Great. I was so very pessimistic because in my head there was absolutely no chance of me ever attending Purchase or any away school for that matter.
As time went by, I became more and more attached to the thought of attending Purchase. Every student there reminded me of myself. It’s hard to put a school where I knew I belonged in the back of my mind because of the fact I couldn’t live at home. I tried, boy did I try for months on end but then the biggest blessing and curse occurred.
My boyfriend and I broke up. The ultimate heartbreak. I was absolutely devastated. But as I was trying to mend my broken heart, it hit me… that was the push I needed. My mindset completely changed, I needed to get out of my town, I needed change, I needed a fresh start. I committed to Purchase and I felt every emotion in the book from happy to sad to all the anxiety I could feel.
This was going to be the start of a new chapter I wasn’t so sure I was ready to write. Did I make this decision based off of the wrong reasons? No. I made this decision for all of the right reasons; I knew this was the place I was meant to be all along. Even if my final decision was made because of a negative, it turned out to be a huge positive. I never thought I could make a home out of a college. I have grown so much as a person, my views of life, love, compassion and respect have all morphed for the better.
I met my best friend who I couldn’t picture my life without. I feel like I’ve known them for my entire existence. I feel crazy and free, independent. I’ve always been my own person, but I’m starting to really find who I am. What I stand for. What kind of person I am meant to be. Going to Purchase was the most horrifying decision I have ever made, but I can’t and don’t want to imagine my life if I made any other decision. Purchase is where I am meant to be, it is where I was destined to end up, Purchase is my home.
Growing up is scary, but that’s how it should be. If you aren’t nervous, and afraid to take a leap and go on a new adventure, to start a new chapter of your life, are you really living? You need to step out of your comfort zone to grow; you need to do something that terrifies you. We’re all just trying to find ourselves in this world, don’t hold yourself back from finding your true potential because you are fearful. To grow, you need to take the leap. Find yourself, find your happiness, it’s waiting for you. I know I did!
